Sunday, April 10, 2011

State fluctuations and blow ups are normal

I didn't do any sarging tonight.  I was hoping Seagull would come out to the Schaumburg area so I could sarge after my friend's wedding but he stayed in the city.  It worked out okay.  I had fun and people partied at the hotel afterwards.  I was too drunk so I was half asleep on this chair most of the time.  There was plenty of comedy in all the random drama from people I knew from the wedding party. 

Jeffy Show 2:
 Before I went out, I watched the Jeffy Show 2.  The infield video part later in the video was helpful.  I know the hotseat program would help me out tremendously cause it's like 8+ hours of infield video.  The three Jeffy videos gave me insight on how to escalate in the set.  I learned more stuff I could have done with the French girl that I screwed up with on Friday.  Well, anything would have worked there, but I see what to do in general.  I can face the girl and put her arms over my shoulders.  I can put my arms around her and rest them on her lower back and move them down to her ass later.

What's normal in field:
The past few days, I've been wondering why I had sudden state loses.  I realized from the Jeffy Show 2 that even the gurus get those state drop periods during a night.  The important thing is not to analyze your state drop and cause an even larger crash.  You move around and keep opening sets and work through it.  It turns out I've mostly been doing the right thing during my state drops.

There have just been awesome days were I don't lose state the whole night.  That's due to beasting mode.  That's going out and constantly opening.  You build momentum over the night and over days and you can get to the point where you're just in massive state and you open nonstop sets with no hesitation.  I started to think I should always feel like that which is unrealistic.

Too outcome oriented:
I realized too that I've been losing state because I've been too outcome oriented.  I know I'm not supposed to care emotionally but I realize now that I have been caring.  In my head, I guess I started to believe like my days could always be like that one Friday when I was out on Hubbard.  It was when I started showing strong intent on the opener.  I was lucky in that most sets reacted positively and I had no massive blow outs.  Jeffy explaining how a certain number of sets will basically hate you, a certain number will be totally into you, and the rest are cool with you but it doesn't go anywhere (cause they have a boyfriend, or they are just not into you but enjoy you attention and conversation.) 

I was losing states cause blowing up 5-6 sets in a row made me feel like I was doing something wrong.  That's just standard deviation, to use a poker term.  If say, 30% of sets are gonna react badly to me no matter what, then I could have just happened to hit those sets in a row.  I should be happy that they bust me out fast rather then me wasting my time in a 20 minute set that goes nowhere.  I have to admit that the several blowouts in a row dropped my state and that just started happening recently.  I guess that more success made me outcome oriented.

Finally,on Friday, I felt myself playing a few sets "safely."  I'd tell myself that I didn't want to claw them aggressively like I should cause I didn't want to risk getting a bad reaction.  The whole point of doing that is that it create attraction by showing dominance.  In Jeffy Show 2, I learned that it also filters out the girls that will basically string you along before rejecting you so they have entertainment for the night.  The example was that a girl who is in love with her boyfriend is forced to go out with a friend.  Instead of standing there bored our of her mind, she suddenly finds herself with a cool guy to talk to the whole night.  She loves that better than being bored.  When you push the kino escalation, she's forced to reject you if she really isn't gonna hook up with you.  This way is better as you don't waste time being strung along. 

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