Last night wasn't that great of the night in terms of sarging. I got into a bunch of sets, some longer sets too, but I never really got anything going. One big set I got into was in a booth, and somehow I ended up sitting away from my target. I guess the lesson is that I should have taken the opportunity to sit next to her when two friends got up to go to the bathroom. When they returned, I ended up talking to one of the friends as she sat next to me. I was escalating her a bit but then she mentioned some boyfriend. I stopped escalating but maybe I should have just ignored it and tried to number close her like I mentioned I should have done in sets over the last two weeks.
Another set seemed okay but for some reason I just wasn't kino escalating fast enough. That set was funny cause they remembered I had opened them at first bar we were at. I didn't recognize them until I thought about it for like ten seconds. I probably could have number closed the girl. I got distracted cause we this community guy that was friends with Herschey. Then, I saw this girl who seemed cool when I talked to her. I had seen Seagull's friend earlier and he was with some guy so I had no idea it was one of his girls. Seagull didn't mention it either and I wasted about ten minutes trying to sarge her. I guess our interaction did seem weird. She seemed cool and we started to talk about travel and stuff. I kept trying to get closer and she kept moving away till finally I just pulled back too. I talked to someone else and then I went back in and tried to claw her and she pulled back again. I had seen her looking at Seagull's friend so then I guessed she might be with him. Finally I asked Seagull, and he told me she was with him. After that, I guess I could have went back into the set and talked to my girl but now a third girl was there and we ended up just leaving.
Kiss close too soon: red light:
I think this reference experience will help me go for kiss closes more often. In the short term, I have to admit that maybe this set was the reason I was a little hesitant on the kino in the set I just described. Maybe not though as I can remember several sets that I kino escalated fast. Anyway, I opened a girl standing by the bar. She was holding strong eye contact and seemed comfortable with me getting closer to her and with holding her hand. The conversation was good too. I decided to isolate her cause I wanted to try to kiss her.
She was giggling about something and then I said, "Hey, come over here by the buffet area. (My buddy later told me there was no buffet area, but I had seen some food in this reserved seating area that looked like a buffet)" I grabbed her hand as I said this and starting leading her. She replied "I can't leave my friend." I had been introduced to the friends earlier so I turned to them and said, "Well, be right back. I want to show her something." One girl said, "Ok" so I grabbed my target's hand again and started leading her to front of the bar.
Here is where I screwed up. I remember we talked for like a minute.
She had accused me of being drunk earlier. I had only had one beer about a half hour before we got to this bar so I knew I wasn't. The thing is I'm having a hard time remember exactly what I did after I had her isolated. I remember telling her that the buffet was over on this table but it was gone now. I remember putting my arm around her and giving her some statement of interest. I remember holding both her hands as I was facing her. I remember gazing into her eyes and saying, "I want to kiss you." I started to lean in and she said again, "You are drunk. I have to get back to my friends."
Whoops. I guess my post for myself before I went out about going for the kiss resonated in my head: I actually went for the kiss. She was into me, but obviously I went for it too soon. I just needed to talk to her some more. I also could have kino escalated a little more before going for the kiss. I hadn't stroked her hair, touched her face, and I didn't have my face right up against hers like I have with other sets that I chickened out of kiss closing.
I think this rejection is good reference material. I fear creeping out the girl by going too soon. I did it this time and you know what, it actually wasn't that bad. Sometimes you miscalibrate and get a red light. The rest of the time is either the yellow light of the cheek turn which isn't so bad either. When she turns the cheek and stays, as I've said before, you build attraction. Of course, there is the green light where she kisses you back and you make out.
I'm better off going for things too early like I did here than waiting too long and stalling out. Had I went for it a bunch of times these past two weeks, I would have probably gotten a bunch of green lights.
I guess I went for an instant kiss:
I remember opening this girl who was walking by me on the dance floor. I had grabbed her wrist with the claw and pulled her in. Our faces ended up next to each other while I was pulling her in. She turned her head and kissed my cheek. I wasn't even trying to go for an instant kiss but she interpreted it like that. I guess it's more reference material of how going for kisses it totally not a big deal.
Cubs girl:
I don't think the red light kiss close affected me because I remember this Cubs girl set. She was wearing a Cubs t-shirt. I still had this ears at this point, and as I was walking by her, she opened me with, "Hey, I like your ears."
I had been telling Seagull that I was gonna use Mystery's line, "No you don't, you're attracted to me." I had been opened with "Hey, I like your ears" and I never said the Mystery line. Most of the time, I just said "Thanks." I few times, I just immediately went to introduce myself. This time I put my arm around her and said, "No you don't, you're attracted to me." I remember that she just smiled.
We starting talking as I had the claw on her shoulder. She told me she was into sports. We talked a bit but she wasn't into football. She was into baseball, and of course, I told her I was a Sox fan. I tried to transition into travel, but she told me she doesn't travel. I talked up travel anyway cause I can't really understand how someone can't be into traveling. At one point, I removed the claw and grab her hand and faced her. I was really close to her. She was giggling and I thought it was on, but then she stopped things and said, "I have a boyfriend." I usually give RSD Tim's reply, "Do you want a nother?" I grabbed her shoulders I said this and looked into her eyes. She replied, "No."
This set was a perfect example of why RSD promotes this fast kino escalation. The is one of the sets Jeffy describes as "Haha, but no" set. If I had run my old verbal with very little game, this girl probably would have talked to me for a long time. She was attracted to me and the conversation was decent. She'd let me brighten her day but I'd never get anywhere. By getting physical fast, she had to throw out the "But no" right away. Jeffy describes it as her thinking, "Oh no. What about my boyfriend who's at home playing Playstation." This girl didn't want to cheat on her boyfriend even though she liked me, so she had to stop things. Good for me as I can move to the next set.
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