Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Hurts to feel like an AFC All over again...

This hurts so badly. I can't remember the last time I was affected this badly by anything that happened to me in the field.  Part of it is because this girl seemed to be my best option.  She was constantly replying to the texts and I made such a beautiful sarge on Thursday to get her.  The one thing I learned long ago though is that regardless of what ultimately happened, it doesn't take away from Thursday sarge.  Thursday was evidence of the skills I do have.  I have the ability to make matrix like moves happen, but I can't expect to do it every time. 

There are so many girls out there.  I'll get a chance to meet so many of them over the next four days.  As long as I can forget about this, I can get out there and continue to have fun and improve.  I might even get some make outs or more.  I also learned a lot today and it's made me realize how I just have to change these things that are holding me back.  It's hard to learn those big lessons without some harsh experiences to really cement them. 

This hurts so badly cause I feel like an AFC all over again:

The pain isn't so much that I lost the girl.  Heck, I can even try texting her again in a few days.  I have other numbers that might yield results and my game is improving with each night I go out.  The girl isn't even that special.  She's cute and attractive but not the hottest girl and not even really the type I normally go for.  I don't feel that connection I did with some of the girls that I can't even get to respond by text right now.  That would be that blonde from Joe's last week who travels and likes foreign films, and that girl I sarged early Friday night.  (I think my mistake with the Friday night girl was not enough kino escalation.  I felt like it was day game cause it was quieter, but I still messed up.  I remember grabbing her hand and her seeming receptive to hand holding yet I let her hand go right away.)

No, this hurts so badly because this is the type of thing I used to feel all the time before I found the community.  I was a WBAFC to use the old fast seduction acronym.  I would never get the girl.  Someone else would always get the girl.  A contributing factor is that I'm the one who encouraged this girl to come out and then the place had to be closed to screw things up.  That's what happens when you push things though.  Part of me wants to say that it would have been better if I had not had her come out.  Yeah, turns out it would have been but you can't play it safe.  This game rewards you for taking chances in the long run.  You play it safe and you don't get results. Even when it came to dealing with this, facing the dudes head on was the move and I might have recovered the set at that point.  Stalled and didn't pull the trigger and got more screwed. 

It's like I said in my first entry of the night.  I'm just a little hesitant to do certain things that push my comfort zone.  I have to get over that. 

Focus on the good:
Yeah this sucks.  It's sure better than playing World of Warcraft.  Well, this hurts, but at least I'm getting out there.  I'm working on my sticking points and this practice is gonna pay off.  My game is just way beyond the level I was at when I started up again three weeks ago.  I remember being hesistant to approach.  I'd stand one or two feet away with all my sets.  I wouldn't try to get the girls on the dance floor even when it was obvious they wanted to go.  I would even get close to the girl when I saw the doggy dinner bowl look. 

I'm now approaching almost everything.  I'm approaching those tall girls who'd I'd be intimidated to approach.  (BTW, I cam to a realization about that.  I'm not hooking any of those cause I'm treating them differently.  To make myself approach, I told myself to just approach and I told myself too that I probably was gonna get rejected.  All I have to do now is start kinoing them like any other girl and proceeding and they'll start liking me like many other girls.)  I kinoing more aggressively and creating that man/woman conversation dynamic Jeffy talks about. 

My game really has improved so much compared to those first two days I went out with Seagull three weeks ago.  If I had video of that me and the one out in the field now, you would not believe it could be the same guy with only three weeks apart.  I should be happy about that.  I think I'll get over this.  There's always tonight. 

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