Friday, September 30, 2011

Pushing too hard to go to her place but good Day 2

I will call this girl "Math girl" for reasons that will only make sense to me. I met her at Vinny's favorite place that Friday that I had the 3 number closes. I followed through on my plan to text my numbers from that weekend. I sent texts Friday night with the "Hope you got home safe" text and then I waiting till Sunday and Monday to follow up.

Somehow, I managed to do the right things with Math girl. 2j explained how he tries to build attraction through flirting, misinterpretation, and other means. I have a hard time making flirty texts, but I somehow managed to do it with one of her texts. I gave a flirty response that also made her envision us in a sexual situation and it worked as she typed and "LOL" and played along with it. Then I switched gears a bit and text some regular conversation before deciding to suggest we meet this week. She was about to go to bed but she told me she's usually busy during the week but has free time during the weekend.

I knew it was on when I didn't text her Tuesday. I was busy Wednesday and my Polish friend wanted to hang out with me for my birthday. We had lunch and then went to see a movie. When I came out of the movie, I saw I had a text from Math girl. I knew that was a good sign as at this early stage, girls don't often initiate texts. Many girls will respond and then I can occasionally set up a meet. When girls are texting me out of the blue, I know it's on.

We ended up setting up a meet for Thursday night.

I don't want this to be a one night thing:

That's a line I remember from when I first starting doing pickup. Girls often are afraid you'll disappear after you hook up with them, so saying that is a good way to make them more comfortable about hooking up with you. As Style said, there are light and dark sides of the game. Coming form the dark side, you say stuff like that and use other techniques so you can fuck a girl. I don't like to do that. I would only say that if I wanted more than just a SNL.

Math girl has been different than many of the girls I met this summer, at least thus far. We had great conversation from the beginning. I'm sure it helps that I was way more relaxed that my last day two, but it also helps that we seem to be compatible. I have cool stories, ect, but she kept up her end of the conversation. I enjoyed hearing her opinions on things and hearing her stories about her life.

When I told her later that I didn't want this to be a one night thing, I meant it.

Pushing too hard for the pull:
I don't want to go into the details of the night too much. We met for margaritas. We stayed there a long time and at no point was I getting the feeling that she wanted to leave. It was obvious we both wanted to keep the night going. I wanted to move things along so I suggested going for a walk. We stopped at this bar that was by the train and had a drink. We talked for a long time there and then I tried to go back to her place.

I told her we would just there and hang out. I suggested grabbing some liquor nearby. She initially agreed to the idea but then while waiting for the train and on the train ride, she changed her mind. When we got to her stop, she said we'd go to a bar near there as she wasn't ready to let me come home with her.

I think I kept pushing as I really knew part of her wanted it to happen. She had basically agreed for a moment to let me come over.

I think she couldn't fool herself. In her head, she had decided if she let me come over, she was going to have sex with me. Most girls figure that's what will happen, but they'll focus on the BS reason for going there and tell themselves the sex just happened. They will let it happen that way, but Math girl wanted to decide she was gonna have sex with me right then at the bar before she'd let me come over and she couldn't do it.

Again, she was definitely torn about it. She make comments about me sleeping over. She even said she had to get up early but she kept wanting to hang out. We probably could have hung out even longer but in the end I wanted to go. I wanted her to get some rest anyway instead of us just cuddling in the bar all night.

When to burn the set to the ground:

I decided near the end that I was done pushing for it. I felt like I was getting annoying. I also decided that I was happy with the evening. We were into each other, we had kissed multiple times. We were sitting on a couch in the bar in embrace the whole last hour. She made it clear she wanted to see me again and even hinted that we might hook up next week.

2j reminded me that sometimes you should burn sets to the ground. It's when a girl is leaving the next day or has a boyfriend. In this situation, he would have stopped pushing for it this night. He said it's a calibration issue; he's right, I just need more experience. I knew enough to stop at one point and while I should have stopped sooner, I don't think I ruined it.

She likes me too much:
It's funny how that works. This girl is really into me and that's part of why she wants to take things slow. When I first started pickup, I always wanted to create serious connection and attraction but it's detrimental to the quick lay. 2j reminded me that it might take longer to hook up with girls when you're in this situation, but usually the sex will be better when it happens.

Anyways, I focused on pulling the whole summer. It's fine to change things up and possibly develop some sort of LTR or MLTR. I had a great time tonight. I miss having awesome conversation and having a connection with a girl. I'd like to cuddle with her and sleepover there.

Of course, a same night lay is fun too. I can see how eventually, finding emotional connections with girls is way more valuable than quick sex. My skill level isn't quite there, but I can see the path where SNL's and pull will be easy. I can see how it will always be hard to find a girl that has some of the other qualities that I look for in a girl such as intelligence, someone I can have deep conversations with or who shares my world view.

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