Sunday, August 5, 2012

SNL Part 2: Inept but leading pull and a money wing

Some pulls are text book easy and some are messy.  Sometimes, you just hit it off with a girl, and then you say "Let's get out of here" and things basically take care of themselves.  For example, she just follows you out.  You get in a cab, she tells the driver her address, you go up, you make out, you escalate, you get no LMR, and you fuck.  Messy pulls mean you have to play tug of war with friends, or you may have to drag the girl to the front of the venue 4-5 times before you'll leave with her.  You might get massive LMR, or you might just get drama you have to push through.  Tonight, I would say this was partially messy pull featuring a fortunate, quick thinking food extraction, a mistake, and a facilitating wing.

Are you a closer?
I think about Ozzie and Hoobie from RSD when I ask myself that question because of their speeches in Transformations.  I thought about that tall blonde who was so into me at Kincaid's a few weeks ago.  Part of me wanted to press for a venue change and maybe a pull with her but there were two girls and a guy to maneuver through that night.  I decided to just take the number close and that turned out to be flaky.  Sometimes you just have to strike while the girl's buying temperature is up and not hope to get a Day 2 with the phone number.  The girls sometimes are drunk and then when they wake up sober they forget who you are when you're texting or they just want to forget about some bar make out or they worry what dumb stuff they might have said to you when you met them.

Part of me wanted to practice ego protection and just be happy with the number close.  Perhaps, tonight's bad state was a gift.  No, not perhaps, my shit state was key tonight.  If I had been in a good state, I would have opened up other sets and left this number to pursue as a Day 2.  In some other reality, maybe I pulled anyway or I pulled a stunner or whatever.  What I do know is this number had a high chance of flaking.  Let's call this girl "Firework."  I'm referring to that girl I talked to because Nintendo happened to open set near us when I was pressuring him to open this other set by a table instead.  I think this number might have flaked because though I knew she was drunk, I had no idea she was way more drunk that I realized when I met her initially.  She kept forgetting my name and details about me.  I would have text her Sunday or Monday and I wouldn't be surprised if she would remember little or anything about me.

Text game can turn a situation like that around and get a Day 2.  My text game is bad.  I usually only get Day 2's if the girl was really into me on the initial meet, or if I happen to hit on some common interest in our text exchange.  I've read Nintendo and 2j's text game, and I lack their wit and sexual banter.  I often write boring texts that are too long, or I just do the simple texts (which again only work if I really had a good initial impression).

Tonight I was gonna be a closer and it started with the closer mentality.  I knew this girl was into me so why not try again.  I also didn't have other options as I wasn't hooking the few times I was opening.  As I wrote in Part 1, the creepy bust outs did serve to improve my state and I was feeling better when I opened her again.

"You look familiar."
I had spotted her a few times dancing with her friends in the same spot when I met her.  This time, I came up and she was dancing next to just one friend.  I went up to her and said, "Hey, you look familiar."  She smiled and I pulled her into me.  We danced for like a minute.  Then we stopped and she was just looking into my eyes so we kissed.   This reminds me of something I've hit upon in other report.  I sometimes have problems creating kiss closes.  I don't often miss these opportunity.  If the girl is gazing into my eyes, I'm gonna kiss her.  It's when I'm in a situation where I'm not as into the girl, or it's lukewarm, yet she'd probably let me kiss her, that I have problems setting up a kiss.  I keep thinking there's a way to set it up so I get the girl to gaze into my eyes.  My wings tell me, and I know I don't have to set it up like this.  I also know that by just going for the kiss you create attraction and make it more likely because I know if I get rejected, I'll be cool and that will just make her want it to happen later.

She really wanted to make out.  It wasn't as much as with that Russian bisexual girl, but she really wanted me nonetheless.  I learned from my screw up of overescalating that night so I broke it off early with Firework.  I remember saying something like, "Let's take this slow."   We danced and grinded and kiss a bit.  Some of the friends seemed to have left the venue but I knew there were some around so I wanted to move her.  In addition, it's just good game to move a girl around a venue.  If she's not gonna follow you in the venue, you're not gonna pull her.  I learned from a screw up Friday with this girl on the dance floor (I'll write about that in another post later).  I failed to pull from the friends and got busted out.  I also learned from a success two Fridays ago where I dragged a girl (I'm calling her "Nugget" when I write that report).  I dragged Nugget from a seating area, to dancing, then deep into the dance floor, to a couch, upstairs in the club, and then to Rock and Roll McDonald's.

I dragged her downstairs.  We grind-ed a bit and then I sat her down.  We made out but I kept it short, again to maintain buying temperature but not over escalate.  We just chatted and I kept up the kino by rubbing her leg and having my arm around her.  This was when I realized the number probably would have flaked.  I had to tell her my name like 6 times before she finally remembered it.  (AFC's probably would make negative comments about the girl being drunk.  The thing is that drunks are the norm at bars and clubs.  That's the nature of night game and even if you do a Day 2, the girls often drink.  She sobered up after all the time we wasted and as you'll see, she ended up having a great time.)

I always complain that this venue has no air conditioning downstairs.  I was dripping sweat.  I had her come upstairs by one of the vents.  I always note the cooler areas in the bar because dancing makes me overheat.  I'm in shape now and slim but I just sweat a lot whe n I exert myself.  We talked a bit there and I mentioned food.  That seems to be my default pull reason.

Walking endlessly:
Here is where I had a minor screw up.  She agreed to food so I lead her outside.  I didn't want to do Rock and Roll McDonald's again so I just started walking.  As we were walking, I came up with this idea to walk to J Dawg's.  I think that's the name: it's a fast food place that's open late on the weekends near the Loyola Law School just off Chicago Ave near the Red Line stop there.  I like to walk a lot.  Fortunately, this girl wasn't wearing heels or I might have busted out from the girl needing to walk so far.  We started to walk that way and I tried to figure out logistics.

She lived in the suburbs and farther than I did.  She asked me if I lived nearby.  If I had a place, I could have just pulled her there.  As it was, I probably should have just went to my car and starting driving to my place. By the time the friends really started interfering on the phone, we would have been 75% of the way to my place.  Instead, we were walking on the streets.  She complained about how far the walk was and then asked where my car was.  I decided to walk to the car and she realized we were backtracking and even said we should have just walked there in the first place.

My plan was to start driving to my place.  I remembered White Castle worked as a reason to drive Promoter girl to my place.  I mentioned White Castle as we were walking to the car.  During the walk, I just kept talking about random stuff.  I remember Jeffy saying you just talk to keep the mood going.  One thing I'll learn from tonight is that I should have kept kissing her occasionally to keep buying temp up.  I also should consider doing the trick of turning a girl's phone off.  The friends almost screwed me tonight, and in future situations, I will lose a pull because I didn't shut a girl's phone off.

The phone call:
We finally got into the car after what seemed like ages.  I remember using Julian's line of "We're going on an adventure."  It also popped into my head to use a Tim type roleplay.  I remember mentioning that we were having fun and we were really secret agents out to save the world.  I started driving towards my place.  Initially, I had said I'd drop her off all the way in the suburbs.  I told her I'd get her home safely.  As soon as I got on the on ramp, her phone rang and she answered.  The girls where asking her where she was. I was on the Ohio Feeder ramp.  I was gonna take the Kennedy to my house.  She said she needed a ride to the hotel . I told her we'd get food and I'd drop her off.

She told me to take the Dan Ryan route.  She was talking about me dropping her off at the hotel now.  I was thinking, "WTF?" but  I stayed cool.  I told her we should go to Lincoln Park and now it was her fault that we were driving the wrong way.  She talked about the hotel and then it popped into my head to go get taco's.  We were on the route that Nintendo and I often take to get to his house.  We also often stop for tacos on 18th street.

I've never gone to the taco place without Nintendo.  Suddenly, I start to worry that we passed it.  We passed the 18th street Pink line and I knew for sure we had passed it.  I didn't want to look dumb and turn around so I decided to go to the taco place by Nintendo's place.  I tried calling him but there was no answer.  That turned out to be a key choice.

This is an example of why you shouldn't sweat things.  You have to have faith that you'll figure out things.  I passed the taco place but had a backup plan.  I even noted this diner on Western in case the taco place was closed.

I'll note that several times during the ride, the friends were texting and calling.  She told them we were getting tacos and then I'd drop her off.

"Get me some tacos" -Nintendo.
Nintendo is an awesome wing man.  Just in general, he's always looking out for his wings.  There were times in the past when he had too many guys out and spent too much energy trying to help everyone out.  He also is on the same page as I am when it comes to pushing for closes.  Finally, he just plans ahead in ways that sometimes don't occur to me.

He called me when I was at the taco place.  I told him I had planned to go to our usual taco place but wound up at the one by him.  I told him I was with that girl from that set he opened earlier.  He said I should try to pull her to his place.  I responded that I'd try.

He called back about 5 minutes later and asked me to pick him up 3 tacos.  He said that I'd bring the tacos up and we could all chill and have some drinks.  The blonde Irish girl was with him and then they'd leave us in the living room.

Jeffy says you gotta explain less:
I'm so grateful for Jeffy responding to my field report I posted on RSD last year about that black girl I should have banged.  The advice I took away was you just have to lead and lead and blow off some objections.  Back then, I tried to explain things too much.  While we were at the taco place, the texts and phone calls continued.  Firework kept saying we had to drive back soon.  I assured her that I'd get her home safely and just kept a calm state.  In the past, I would have been worrying to much about how I was gonna make it happen.

We talked a bunch while we ate and then we got the tacos and left.  I kissed her outside and we got in the car.  I thought about how I was gonna get her to come upstairs.  It turned out there was no resistance to that at all.  I'm sure it was because part of her wanted this to happen as well if things went smoothly.  I was hoping for a spot in front, but I took the spot in the alley.  I told her we were just gonna drop off the tacos.

She got out of the car and walked with me.  This was amazingly without incident.  I remember that 2-set with G that gave so much resistance to going up to his place.  I was prepared but again, it was no problem.

She recognized Nintendo.  We went upstairs and she immediately went to the bathrom.  Nintendo told me that his girl was passed out in his bed.  He wanted me to go look.  I had to piss anyway, so I went to use his bathroom.  There she was sleeping in his bed.

Nintendo ate his tacos and poured us hard liquor on ice.  I sat her down next to me.  He did a good job taking some pressure off but just being cool and friendly.  That helped her feel comfortable being at his place.     Having cool wings is important because if you have some weird friend instead, she wouldn't have been comfortable messing around with me there.

As Nintendo had said on the phone, he disappeared after eating the taco.

Little LMR:
As soon as he left, we started making out and now that I was in a seduction location (to use the old MM terms) I didn't have to hold back . I really started to turn it on and we both started to get really into it.  I dragged her to the couch and it was on.

Thinking back on this, I remembered the missed lays I had with those two girls that had been on my bed.  Yeah, that sucked, but I felt more comfortable escalating here as a result of those screw ups.  

She resisted a few times by saying she had to go really soon.  I just reassured her.  I threw out, "We shouldn't be doing this."  That's the old nugget that you need to slow things down and/or throw out objections otherwise she'll do it.

The key thing is that while I wanted sex, I didn't need it.  I can finally say I understand what this means.  I struggled with this aspect of theory before.  I remember her telling me to stop one point when I was touching her pussy.  I pulled my hand back.  I pulled back from the make out.   As we held eye contact I said, "I don't want you to do anything that you're not comfortable with.  We can leave at anytime."  I know I said the later several times when she mentioned having to get back to the hotel.  

You can throw out lines, but I can say I understand the non neediness for sex theory now because I actually felt this way.  I had a good time and yeah I wanted to have sex.  At the same time, I didn't need to have sex with her to feel like the night was validated or I was validated.  I knew she was probably throwing out a token objection anyway, but I was cool with that and I was cool if she actually wanted to stop.  What happened?  Well, she just smiled and pulled me into her and initiated the make out.

I forgot about Andydufresne:
I won't go into any more detail about the sex.  I'll say that there were signs that if we have  a second encounter, sparks are really gonna fly.  There were hints of that here but there was also the awkwardness of first time sex as well but I had a great time and she said she did as well.

I was lying on Nintendo's couch naked and had Fireworks in my arm when I heard a door opening.  I thought it might be Nintendo's roommate, but he seems to never come out in the middle of the night when I've been there.  I thought it might by Nintendo, but then I heard stair climbing.  I then remembered that Andydufresne was temporarily staying in Nintendo's room.  I pulled a couch pillow onto of me.  Firework was embarassed and pulled a pillow in her face.

I saw Andydufresne's head appear as he ascended the final stairs.  I started giggling.  This is how it goes with PUA's.  He walked in one me there and then shortly afterward, he walked into Nintendo's room to get on his   temporary bed there and then saw a girl sleeping next to Nintendo.  This is the PUA lifestlye.

Mixed emotions:
Firework had a good time.  I could tell by the smile she had and the way she was holding my hand on the drive back.  She also had to deal with societal pressure and even worse, she had to go back to a room full of several girls from the party who would lay their judgement upon her.  She was anxious about this.  She talked about it and apologized at the same time because she said she didn't want to make it sound like she didn't have a good time because she had enjoyed our adventure.

I told her my feelings on this.  I said that I get it.  I understand society pressure women in this way.  I told her that she's a grown woman who can make her own choices.  I told her there's nothing wrong about a woman liking sex and I don't judge.  She said, "I told myself I didn't want to be 'that girl" tonight.  I didn't want to be the girl in the bachelorette girl that ditched the group and went home with a guy."

I made light out of it.  I said, "Hey, it could be worse.  At least I'm cool.  At least I'm not an asshole."

I suppose it's a bit cocky, but it's true.  Some guys bang girls and then either purposely make them feel like trash or don't care if they make the girls feel like that.  I actually am a nice guy.  I believe in the light side of the game.  I remember telling her at one point on the ride back, "I'd like to see you again, but I leave it up to you whether you want this to be a one time thing or if you'd like to see me again."  She took my number there. I had her number, but this was good.  I learned I had her correct number when she called my phone.  It is possible that she could have drunkenly typed her number in wrong earlier and that would have been horrible.  She would have thought I  was blowing her off when I in fact do I want to see her again.

As we neared the hotel, we came up with some plan on what she'd say to her friends.  I remember also saying that if her friends had parties till closing time (it was around 5am when I dropped her off), it wouldn't have been as a big of a deal that she was showing up at that time.  I also said that yeah, they might judge her and girls do that but at the same time, it's nothing that each of those girls hasn't done before.

I really am a good guy?:
I put a question mark because I'll close this again by saying that's a big inner game realization.  Sure, I know that but tonight really reinforced it on many ways.  Because I decided to man up and be a closer, I helped create an awesome evening for both Firework and I.  On top of that, while she loathed dealing with the judgement from her friend circle in the hotel room, she had to realize that she picked a nice guy to hook up with.  I was empathetic to her plight and I'm really am nonjudgmental.  A lot of guys would think she's a "slut."  I don't view her in that negative light.  I think she made a good choice in hooking up with me :) and I don't judge her for doing it so quickly.  I'm a PUA and I want to hook up with girls fast and I have no problem with girls who do that, and that's whether it's with me, with other guys.  I don't care if they do SNL's once in awhile or often.  Women and men should enjoy sex.

While I often have doubted myself, this SNL really is going to help cement it in me that I'm a high value guy in many ways and I should never doubt myself when I'm out in the field.  If I do things right, I really will give a girl a good, positive experience with me.  By choding around or not being a closer, I'm depriving her of that experience.  Even worse, she might end up getting pulled by some asshole or some loser instead, so I'm gonna be motivated to be a close even more now.

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