Pickup is the hardest thing

I swear that learning pickup is the hardest thing I ever learned.  I can't believe I've been doing this shit for 10 years and still not doing as well as I could.  That sentence is being negative.  To be fair and positive, I've learned and experienced a lot since embarking on this journey.  I've lost a lot of my insecurity and become more relaxed overall.  There are so many periphery skills that I learned along this journey from something as simple as ironing a shirt to being comfortable on the dance floor to amusing myself.

I wish I had seen Tyler's video about hard case newbies years ago and I would have been less frustrated early on.  He talks about how if you are really social awkward and terrible with women, it will take 2-3 years of work before you can start seeing any results.

On the other hand, had I read that, maybe I would have quit the journey before I ever progressed.  I was lucky that despite taking time off several times, I always knew I'd come back to working on this skill.  Ever since I read The Game, I had a blind faith that this was a skill I could learn and improve and now the changes I've made in myself and my bits of success drive me on even when I get frustrated.

As I was writing this, I decided to read some really old posts from the other blog.  I stopped posting there in 2007.  I think I need a good reminder of what my nights used to look like.  I realize that even what I would call a shitty night like Wednesday and Saturday are way beyond how it used to be for me early on.

I know that if I stick with this, I'll have even more crazy nights and I eventually will start pulling girls regularly.  I know I have no choice.  I won't quit because there is a no alternative.  If I stop, I'll just have no girls and be stuck whacking off, though strangely enough, my first girlfriend said she'd fly me out to impregnate her as she wants a baby and would rather have mine than some random sperm donor from the clinic.