We talked for a bit and opened some sets and then they had to go. Part of me did want to leave, but I knew it was stupid to come all this way and not do shit. Besides, I had gotten through the hardest part of going out alone: getting started.
Fundamentals:
The old bit of wisdom is that everything comes back to fundamentals, no matter what skill level you are at in something. Supposedly, pro players will still do a lot of training in fundamentals. I get some advanced level stuff right, but I still screw up some little things.
Staying in set:
The old bit of community wisdom was that you should stay in set until you bust out. This has changed to RSD Alex's bit about trying four times, or Tyler saying that you can leave once the anime eyes disappear.
I was definitely leaving several sets too early today. I think I get a warped sense of how things are going to go down as a result of having some super positive responses. It's like if the girl doesn't give me massive IOI's right off the bat, or has the anime eyes, I decide to leave after just a minute or two.
Deep down, I think it's a more advance level of fearing rejection, or Tyler's old bit about "state control." I can make myself open but then I think I try to protect my ego by taking the good opening sometime and not plowing through. By staying in, I can get the girl: number close, pull, etc, but by leaving I can take the good opening and not have to face the possibility of getting rejected or screwing up later.
Again, I think the last paragraph is part of it, but I also think that every pickup should be a girl totally into me.
Sober/Drinking:
Today I had two drinks but I was basically sober. I didn't feel anything from the drinks because I came out after having doing some capacity. I literally ate 4 lbs of vegetables along with some cheese, tomatoes, and anchovies and drank at least 3 quarts of liquid.
I realized that dancing is so much easier when I'm drunk or at least buzzed. I was doing a bit of dancing but I wasn't as crazy as when I'm drinking. I had a chance to try to dance with these 4 girls next to me but I chickened out.
When drinking, I just feel better overall which makes it easier to persist in sets and to keep opening. I do need to do more sober sarging because as I've always said, I don't want to become reliant on drinking.
Tall girl:
The perfect example of me not staying in set long enough was when I opened this 4-set. All 4 girls were tall, as in taller than me and 5'10 being the shortest. The girl I wanted was the second tallest and she was probably about 6 feet tall. I did my standard opener busting on her for being too serious. She giggled and starting smiling. I then left.
I saw her later in the night. I opened one of her friends and this girl rejected me by saying, "Oh, I'm with him" pointing to some guy friend. I then saw my girl and I said, "I choose you Pikachu" and she started smiling and giggling again.
I think I must have been intimidated by her height. I made myself approach and actually got a positive response, but I didn't believe in myself enough to keep talking.
I mean this is dumb basic stuff. The girl responded positively to me twice and I just walked away after instead of persisting.
My final chance came when I was playing with my phone and she walked by alone. I thought about opening her and trying to dance with her to this song but I didn't act on it right away and then it was too late.
Treat the hot ones like I treat the non attractive girls:
I remember this Tyler video where he explains that basically if you can act the same way you do to a non or not so attractive girl with the hotter ones, you'll get the same results. There was this cute but overweight girl on the dance floor. I went up to her super confident and got really close to her. She was into me but said something about a boyfriend. I did my usual bit saying, "Hey, you are single tonight." She actually giggled to that and said,"I'm flattered but my boyfriend is here."
I think back about how I opened and ran that set. It comes back to entitlement, which Tyler talks about in several videos. I felt like I could get a girl like that easily, so I acted super confident when I was talking to her.
The ultimate answer to to build entitlement so I feel that way about all girls, including the good looking ones and ultimate the ridiculous and seemingly mythical HB 10's. What I can work on is trying to act that same with girl I am more attracted to because I do all the micro behaviors and body language right when I act like I did with this girl on the dance floor.
I did okay:
I like to beat myself up in these blogs but I should be happy that I stayed after my friends left and still made myself approach. That venue, as I always say, is more difficult because there a bunch of groups that know each other. It sucked being by myself but I did my best to minimize the time I spent playing with my phone.
I made myself keep approaching and tried to stay in a good mood. It's just disappointing that I couldn't create any results. I can only control my effort and I gave it a decent shot. I just am frustrated that I got a good response from that tall girl I liked and I just left. Dang...
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