I was walking back to my car last night and I asked myself how I was going home alone again despite my supposed skills. It amazes me that sometimes that several aspects of my game actually are solid, dare I say, super solid even. For example, I surprise myself with how creative I can be with what I say in set, and I am really getting good at forcing myself to do those dance floor and other more difficult openers. I also know how to just put out the fun vibe. I realized though that I lack in key areas that are hindering my progress.
My main sticking point right now is with persistence, and kino, as I've mentioned numerous times. I need to go back into sets that end for dumb reasons. I'll have several sets that are on but end for various reasons not having to do with the girl not liking me. 2j and Seagull prodded me to go back into this set where the girl was into me, but the friends dragged her away. It was early in the night and someone neither of my wings could keep the friends occupied. I didn't want to go in. 2j told me to go in and try for a number close . I decided to force myself to go back in because I knew I'd regret it if I didn't.
When I went in, the girls were dancing. I reengaged my girl verbally and she and the one friend she was dancing in front of looked at each other, giggled, and then I was back in. Here is where I made a mistake of not trusting my reads. I just went for the number close as 2j suggested even though I felt that it was on but it wasn't on enough to get the number. She resisted the number and then I made one more verbal attempt to address her reservations and then left. I knew the move was not to go for the number at that point and just keep running the set, and I also knew when I got rejected on the number that the move was to just stay in set and go for it later.
2j told me afterwards that even though I got rejected, it was good that I went back in. He was right, and the lesson stuck with me even more that I thought it would at the time.
It's All Clear: The Opportunities That I missed:
Let's go back to that walk back to the car. All the missed opportunities came back to me. You see, naturals would have persisted a bit more in the good sets that I had throughout the night and might have made something happen. I'm hurting myself badly by not going back into sets. I like the football analogies so what I'm doing is the equivalent of putting a good drive together, seeing the holes in the defense and clicking with my team and having to punt or getting a fluke turnover, and then just not trying to drive the ball any more afterwards.
Even before the set I mentioned above, I opened these two really tall (over 6ft without heels) sisters while 2j and Seagull were in a set. The set was going well. The older sister was comfortable enough with me that she said she could only go to two bars because, "Don't tell anyone, but my sister is underage and using my ID and I only trust going to two places that I go to regularly, but we'll be at (a specific after hours bar) later."
My dumb ass didn't even realize until I was laying in bed hours later how that was a big IOI. I'm supposed to try to figure out logistics by asking stuff like, "What are you doing later?" (which I often forget to ask) and this girl is offering up after hours logistics. I should have stopped by that bar later and try to open them again.
My mistake, though, came even sooner. A few minutes later, the girls wanted to go to the bathroom. This was a legitimate bathroom trip and not the blow off kind. The had a bunch of beers at the table and my girl told the sister to stay and watch the beers, but I discovered the couple standing near us was with them and they asked them to watch the beers so I could go together. I should have engaged the couple when the girls left, but it was early in the night, so I just wandered off and hit the dance floor. Seagull and 2j were still in their set at this time.
Now, I obviously should have gone back into the set but I didn't. This would be a recurring theme of the night and it shouldn't be a surprise as I follow this pattern far too often and then I wonder why I don't get laid. I remember opening this set during closing time street game. This girl in this 4 set was really high buying temperature but, being on of those ADD drunk girls, she wandered off. Later, while waiting for Seagull to work this solo set, I saw the 4 set was still around but I didn't return. I should have tried again.
The SNL's and amazing nights happened when I had more confidence in persisting:
That's the lesson I need to take from this and I'll try to work on this next time I out (hopefully tonight but I don't know how awake I'm going to be in 12 hours with 3 hours sleep). A final lesson came at the very end of the night. The crowds had about wound down. Seagull and I spotted a lone wolf walking across the street. We talked about opening her. I had decided I was done for the night but Seagull forced himself to cross the street and open her. The next thing I know, he's walking with her, holding her hand. He later messed it up for dumb reasons even after kissing her several times. The lesson is that I should have pushed the last set as that could have been me.
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