Saturday, April 3, 2010

40 year old wants to go home with me but I escalate too slowly

Tonight just flew by. I started off with some buzzed sarging in Lincoln Park. I front loaded three beers within 20 minutes and then I stopped drinking as I knew I was driving later. Of course, I was more agressive with opening when I'm buzzing. I was sarging this new bartender. It's rare for me to really talk to any of the staff and that's something I should work on in general. Another thing I did was early on, I was opening girls on the dance floor. I still need to work on that, but I'm slowly getting to the point where I'm starting to feel like it's no longer a big deal to open girls there.

I had a blast, but somehow, I was forgetting to actually get the girls. I know I'm being too much of an entertainer/party guy. I should be happy that I can do that as that's a step in the right direction but if I actually want to pull girls, I need to show more intent. That's one of RSD Tim's terms. I need to show the girls that I desire them. Part of that is kino. It about building that sexual tension. I probably should reread Gunwitch. I need to project some more sexuality.

The 40-year old I probably could have gone home with:
We wind up on Division and T meets me there. He opens this two set in our first bar. I see this older woman sitting by herself. When my wing is opening, I hate standing there pretending I'm playing with my phone or just doing nothing. I like to talk to other people. I high five her and start talking to her.

I immediately learn that she's drunk and she wants me. It's crazy. I've never had a woman paw at me so aggressively. She kept putting her arm around me, grabbing my hands, touching my face.

I felt as lost as I did in the past when girls opened me randomly. I didn't think it was real and I wondered if she was messing with me. Fortunately, that was only for a few seconds. I knew that I needed to start kissing her.

Suddenly, this dude comes up. She greets him. I had noticed there was a drink next to her. I say hi and talk to him for about 20 seconds. She's grabbing me as I'm doing this. I'm trying to figure out their relationship. It was weird. She said something like she's being nice to him or he's a friend. He doesn't seem to care that she's all over me so I turn my focus back on her.

I still wasn't completely comfortable with that guy there. I'm holding on hand of hers with my right hand. I start stroking her face and kiss her. I pull back right away.

I forgot to mention that I kept trying to get her to come dance. Perhaps I wasn't being alpha enough or she was too drunk as she wouldn't say anything when I'd mention going to the dance floor. I felt like I would have escalated if that dude wasn't there. Of course, as I write this, I realize I shouldn't have cared about him.

I remember I kissed her and I'm looking into her eyes. She says something like, "Let's get out of here." I say, "Okay" but then I lose confidence and say, "Yeah, let's get some food."

In some ways, that's a good thing to say. Girls often want you to give an excuse because they won't let themselves feel slutty by being so obvious. I can tell as I'm writing this that I miscalibrated. She wanted me to make this happen. I needed to really start making out with her and then pull her out of there.

She also almost fell off the bar stool. She was plastered and that bothered me a little bit.

After another minute or two, she got sick of me not escalating and basically shooed me away. Well, I also think she thought I was messing with her and she started to feel like she wasn't worthy to be with me. I feel weird typing that but I think about how she said, "There's some girls you can get with." She was pointing to this younger, hotter girls next to us.

That's how I feel as I'm writing this report. That all happened so suddenly and so quickly. I do love how some random crazy shit happens to me when I'm sarging. She was older than me, but I would have hooked up with her. She was attractive enough. Heck, she probably was better looking that that married woman I kissed on Sunday.

I let the tall dude next to her bother me when I shouldn't have cared. Yeah, it was smart to talk to him and figure out the deal before I started escalating but after he didn't seem to care that this woman was all over me, I had to be a real man and start giving this woman what she wanted!

I think this situation just highlights what my problem is now. As I wrote above, I need to be more sexual and escalate more. This was an extreme case, but I definitely moved to slowly in many other sets tonight.

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