Sunday, September 1, 2013

Two low probability chances for lays, but maybe should have gone for experience

Tonight, I encountered two situations that had me wondering if I should have pushed a little harder just so I'd gain experience or whether I should just let it go because I'd likely be wasting my time.  Well, that's what I thought at the time, but I think in the end, Seagull and I both concluded that we should have went for the experience.

Haitian Chinatown venue change:
I'll start by saying that I just realized this was another example of some unexpected help from a stranger.  We had been working streets for over two hours and had done a lot of walking.  Seagull I were tired but we had come back by Spy/Sound bar to run street game again for the second time.  We were standing around looking at girls when this security guard for one of the building walked by and said something like, "Why are you just going to look at them?  Why don't you talk to them?"  That's obvious stuff, but we needed the words of encouragement.  This guy later tried to help us with the pull.  Again, it's so weird to get unexpected help in our city; maybe I should believe in karma.  I've been putting out positive vibes so maybe I'm getting dividends from that. 

We opened these two girls that were originally from Haiti.  A little bit earlier in the night, I might not have been interested in this set, but as I kept repeating from RSD Brad's video, "This was wounded gazelle time."  He said that you can be all about hitting up hotter sets, but around closing/pulling time, you might want to lower your standards so you can actually pull.  These girls were cute enough, friendly, and mine was receptive to the kino I was doing. 

I started to think this was going to be the set that we made happen.  I started to talk about venue change ideas and they seemed down.  I had asked a few logistical questions and it turns out that they actually were staying a few towns away from me. 

Suddenly, one of the girls said "Our car is here."  I'm like, "Sweet, let's go to Chinatown."  Then, one girl got in the car and the other walked across the street.  I turned to Seagull and said, "Okay, let's do this."

Seagull replied, "It's not that simple.  This is a big massive set." 

Well, I'm asking more logistical questions as of late, but I guess I have to admit I need to ask even more questions.  Two more girls and a guy came walking across the street.  We exchanged names and I started to talk up Chinatown.  The guy and one of the new girls didn't want to do it.  This girl also tried to tell the one that wanted to go, "Didn't you just eat?"

We sat there for a bit.  The passenger door was open, so I kept talking up food.  The driver really wanted to go.  At one point, I said, "Let's go" and told them to give us a ride.  Realistically, that wasn't going to happen as the car was full, but I told Seagull to try to get in.  He made a half effort to do it. 

I think it was at this point that the security guard came over and tried to say some stuff to help us.  The guy then came out of the car and closed the passenger door, but the driver still didn't want to drive away.  I was asking Seagull if we should keep pushing this.  I said that they could follow me to my car, which was two blocks away, and then follow me for food. 

At this point, I felt like I could make  this happen if I pushed for it, but I started to not want to.  You might say that I began to lose buying temperature.  Had Seagull wanted to push it, I would have done it, but I started to think, "Well, great.  I can get them to go to Chinatown, but then what?  I'm probably not going to be able to hook up with one of these girls." 

We later decided we should have just gone to Chinatown.  It would have been a new experience, and maybe they could have met up with us the next day.  As I'm writing this, I think that early on in the night, I should push for this type of set, but it was near the end of the night. 

Well, it turns out, I still would have a few more opportunities despite turning this down, but I think there might have been something to be gained by following through with this set.

Irish girl walking with no shoes having a bad day:
Sound/Spy Bar had no more sets after we let the Haitian set.  I tried to be in a good mood despite already feeling that bit of disappointment at having yet another day of disappointment for not getting laid.  Well, actually it was different today, because there was actually a high probability lay set that I'm going to write about that we passed up.  I told Seagull we should hit R&R McDonald's one last time. 

As we were walking there, we spotted this lone wolf blonde.  I've let Seagull go open two of these lone wolves in recent memory.  One, he kissed but could get to go home with him (and he sabotaged himself because he was too concerned about getting his stuff out of my trunk that night).  The other he got into a cab with last week but couldn't get upstairs.  I knew that if I didn't make a quick decision, he would go open it, so I sped up to catch up with her. 

I didn't want to startle her as the streets were nearly empty when I caught up with her a few blocks later.  She was crossing the street and a cab trying to run the light buzzed past her.  I yelled, "Hey, you almost got hit by a car, be careful!" 

I caught up with her by one of those city bike rental kiosks.  I said loudly as I was about 10 feet behind her, "Hey, you should just rent one of the bikes, it might be easier." 

This time she turned to look at me.  I caught up and started talking.  I don't remember my exact words but I remember saying, "It looks like you had a bad night."  She was, after all, walking bear foot, alone, and looking like she was in a bad mood. 

She told me that her friends had gotten too drunk and ditched her.  They also had her shoes.  She asked me where the red line was as she was trying to walk there.  She was walking in the wrong direction, but would have eventually would up by the Blue or Brown line about 5-8 blocks later. 

After walking about half a block next to her and talking, she finally stopped walking.  She asked me where I was going.  I told her I was just enjoying walking around but I lived northwest of where we were and was gonna drive home later.  When she mentioned the Red Line, she had mentioned going to a stop that was really far north, like near the end of the line. 

I'll write the conversation exchange below as I can remember it.  I know that I started to think about what would likely happen if I drove her home, and part of me, dare I admit a large part even, figured the likely result would be me wasting my time and gas to drop this girl off about twenty minutes north, when I wanted to go either south or west.  I think she subconsciously sensed this hesitation on my part, and then I think I started to get a bit needy when she lost buying temperature and decided she wanted to get a cab.  I did think of what 2j said last week and driving the set home after the diner.

HB: Can you show me where the red line is?  I'm trying to walk there.
Me: The Red line?  Lol.  You're totally going the wrong way. 
HB: I'm trying to get to (this stop near the end of the line).  Where are you going?
Me: I'm just enjoying the last bit of summer walking around, but I live northwest.  I'll probably drive home soon.

I forget if she asked for a ride, or I brought it up, but at this moment, it was clear that she would accept this ride from me.  This is when I started to think about how I didn't want to be some random chump to just give her a ride home and waste my time and gas.  2j had told me last week that I could have told the Taylor Swift girl, "Hey, if I give you a ride, will you invite me up for a drink?"  That's exactly what I said here.

HB: I haven't 10 roommates.  I can't.  (In my head, I was thinking about how these Irish girls are always a pain because they never live alone.  Even those girls 2j and I were working two years ago had their own place, but they had been sharing a studio apartment together."

I forgot that 2j said that last week, I could have messed around with the TS girl and did a takeaway where I pretended to get pissed and then said, "I'm just kidding" and given her a ride anyway.  He also said I could have just given them a ride anyway even if TS had said she wouldn't invite me in for a drink.  I knew that the move wasn't to do the take away here.  I didn't think about just giving the ride anyway.  In review, I realized that I could have said, "Well, I'll give you a ride, but you owe me a drink later.  If you don't want to hang out with me, you can just give me a drink and leave, but you are giving me a drink.  Were you in girl scouts?  Well, regardless, let's say scouts honor?" 

Instead, Me:  Why don't you come over?  I don't live to far and I have some beers in the fridge.  (In retrospect, I give myself props for actually suggesting this.  I've been writing that I haven't even thought of trying for that type of pull, much less actually mention it.  Fuck, it might have been 10 months or a year since I actually verbally asked a girl to come to my place)>  

HB: I have to work in like 6 hours.  I can't.  (She had mentioned at some point that she had to work early so it was legitimate.) 

Me: (Trying to solve this logistical problem) Where do you work?  (I figured if it was close, I could assure her she'd get there in time.)

HB: I work at bar.  I have to be there at 9am. 

Me: I'll make sure you get home.
HB: I can't.  I'm going to just take a cab home.
Me: That will cost like $30.  My car is just two blocks away.
HB: I think I'm going to take a cab.
Me: (I either grabbed her hands or put my arms on her side)  Look at me.  You can trust me.

She then decided to take a cab and flagged one down.  One just happened to be driving by, so that was it.  I suppose I could have tried more as she was getting in the cab, but I knew I had lost it.  I felt like I had wanted it a little too much at the end.  Even then, I realized if I had just told her I was going to drive her home instead of thinking about how I might be wasting my time, she would have let me.

I should have driven her:
Seagull tried to point out that I should have gone for the experience.  Yeah I was wasting time and gas, but so what? 

I'm forced to agree that I should have driven her.  I liked how I tried to get her to come over and tried to solve the work logistics.  I should have realized then that it wasn't that she didn't want to come over or hook up, but she did have to work early, and was lost and in a bad mood.  Briefly, I had rescued her from a bad evening.  I just had to drive her home and who knows what could have happened?

I realized as Seagull and I were talking by my car several things.  First, driving her home continues the set.  I would have gotten another 20 minutes to talk to her.  (I literally just blurted out "I fucked this up" because the whole thing becomes apparent now as I'm writing this).  Sure, there was still a good chance I'd drive her home and get a number that flaked, but that is certainly a dumb reason not to do it at this point.  My verbal game is good and twenty minutes might (even likely?) have made the number more solid.  Heck, I might have even gotten her to let me go upstairs if I did well during the ride.  Next, I also thought of how this was Crazyfoot's MO for getting laid.  He'd make out with girls, offer them a ride, and then try to get upstairs to their place and then hook up.  That's his only move as he can't bring girls back to his place. 

The other reasons to consider was that it was the very end of the night.  There were likely to be no more sets (though I ended up meeting yet another girl at R&R McDonald's after this).  I had gotten this cute girl (and a genuine Irish girl on top of that, which I didn't expect to find again until next summer) to stop on lonely street to talk to me, and I had reached a point where she would have been comfortable with me giving her a ride home?! 

Yes, I should have done this.  It would have been worth not blowing it off if I had just gotten laid the previous night, or if I really had to wake up early for something today, or if I actually had girls in my rotation that I were seeing regularly.  It might even have been worth not giving the ride if it were a bit earlier in the night (meaning I had a good chance of finding another set). 

I fucked up.  

In closing, I'm forced to be a bit negative.  It's amazing how many possibilities I've found myself with lately.  These nights have been far more interesting lately in that there seem to be so many good prospects.  I could actually see how in an ideal world, you'd have several prospects and would choose to go with the ones with the best logistics.  If all my sets tonight had been in the same venue, I could have picked and chosen, but tonight, maybe I should have just tried to stick with one to the end.  Well, maybe not this likely lay that we gave up...

Oh, so the negative: It's also unbelievable how I can get so close with so many sets and still wind up going home alone?!  It is highly frustrating, but realistically, I see there's clear evidence that I'm learning from this experiences, and that good things will continue to happen.  I know I"m going to break out of this plateau very soon, maybe tonight.  

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