Monday, June 25, 2012

Instant kiss closes at Gay Pride Parade

http://www.rsdnation.com/jlaix/blog/gay-pride?#comment-897833

Jeffy made a post about this Pride festival in San Francisco. He has videos of them having a fun and making out with random girls. He talks about his, "OMG, you are amazing. I love you" opener where you then go for a hug and instant makeout. I had heard about this from Jeffy Show 2 when he talked about using it during street game after the clubs have closed. I experimented with it a bunch last year but I never could get the kiss part to work.

Nintendo and I saw this post last week and when I mentioned the idea of going to the parade, he was all enthusiastic about it. He's the perfect wing to do this as he'll not only approach but he's always willing to do crazy things.

No sleep state:
My sleep schedule is all whacked and has been getting worse from going out every night. What really wrecked it was the girls coming over Wednesday night and me not getting to bed until 11am. Nintendo told me I could stay at his place we we got back from the 2-set pull/Stumbling blonde after Saturday night. He got a few hours of sleep, but I wasn't able to get any despite trying. I did have a bunch of time to read manwhore articles and think about my weekend.

Needless to say, I wasn't my pumped self but I told myself I was gonna try to have fun. To counteract the negative effects and to help us do the crazy opener, we had a few drinks. This is another page out of Jeffy's book: get drunk for festival game.

Train sarging:
We opened girls immediately on getting to the train platform and we were joking with this girl on the train ride up. I often see girls I want to approach while waiting for the "L" but I never approach there. Nestor and I talking to this girl made me realize that it's all in our head. You can open easily in these situations. Yes, you'll get bust outs but it's easier that it seems. Yes, it would feel as easy when done sober, but you don't need to run flash game in day time and in fact, it would be counterproductive to do so. I remember Brad in the spring 2011 Free Tour saying that you just have to be slightly higher energy level. If you just look and say hi, that's often enough to hook the girl in day game.

Northwestern Set & 2-set dynamics:
I learned a lesson in 2-set dynamic by making a dumb mistake. We went to take a piss at Clarke's on Belmont. We had seen the $3 lemonade mixed drink deal as well. We opened this 2-set of the bar. I ended up talking to this cute, thin, blonde who goes to Northwestern. She was physically attractive, but the fact that she has some brain to go to that school is a real turn on. We hit it of and I knew she was into me, but Nintendo wanted to run off and get to the parade area as he wasn't clicking with his girl. I was in a poor state and not feeling alpha so I just went along. That and I figured there were more sets to go.

If I were in my normal state, I would have made him stay. I knew this girl was into me for obvious reasons. Just a minute or two in, I had the attentive look, but she then asked me if Nintendo was my boyfriend, and then if I were gay. When I answered negative to both, she made sure to point out that she was straight. Then, I remember her and the other girl realizing that there big group of friends had run off. The girl Nintendo was talking to said, "Let's got find them." My girl said "No, let's stay" or "No, we can catch up with them later."

I regret leaving but I realized how this often happens with girls that like me when they get pressure for their friends. I'm alpha now and as I said, I would have stayed if I weren't half asleep and drunk at the time. I can only envision how much now the girl feels pressured in the club when her friends want to leave despite the fact that she might like me. This also made me realize that when a girl makes the group stay or lets them walk off, she either is really in tune with herself and/or she really likes me. We know that most girls are all about social status in their group and don't want to make waves by staying when the group wants to leave. They are also less alpha and less likely to stick up to the group if they like a guy.

If I can walk away from this set, then I see how hard it is for the girl not to walk off. Yes, I knew this stuff already, but this was an interest view into the dynamic at work from the other side.

First attempt, Instant kiss:
We had been talking all weekend about using the Jeffy opener but we had to still psych ourselves up into doing it. We stalled by just using regular openers on girls. Nintendo was doing most of the opening and I was passive and not really opening. This was a weird feelings as I'm usually the guy hitting up the sets. Nintedo was doing a good job at keeping our state pumped up and I was feeling better.

I finally decided to go for the opener with this blonde. I didn't expect the opener to work the first time, but I must have done everything right. "You are amazing. I love you." I went to hug her. As soon as I hugged her and our faces were close, she puckered up her lips and kissed me. I remember being shocked by it as I was just getting ready to pucker my lips and go for and suddenly I was getting kissed. Nintendo said that he saw me pull back a little.

The girl then ran off. I realize now that I should have kept that going and turned it into makeout but again, I was even surprised it worked at the time.

Obliterating a kiss close sticking point: 5 more over the day:
Nintendo wanted to get close to the parade route which I think was a mistake. In many areas, we were so packed that it wasn't even possible to stop in the crowd and open . That being said, there were still a ton of sets we walked by. My early success didn't propel me into a Jeffy opening machine. We fluctuated in state and we'd go for long periods of not opening to a frenzied sequence of attempts.

I think I got 5-6 kisses total including from these girls that we think were lesbians. In that set, I kissed both girls.

Weak or Strong, you can tell when you're doing it:
Yes there was some luck factor in which girls were going to do this. Drunk and high buying temperature did make it more likely. The biggest factor was how we actually felt and executed the opener. Nintendo had commented that he could feel when he was doing a half assed version and when he really was doing it right. I noticed that inside myself too. When I really did it right, that had the biggest success rate. That sounds like a truism but I'm trying to say that you can feel as you are doing it if you feel like you're gonna make it happen and the results had a strong correlation to that feeling.

I had a good reference point with this other 2-set. I opened one girl and Nintendo the other. I did a weak version and the girl didn't kiss me. She stood their waiting for her friend. Nintendo then went for the make out and got it. Yes, you can argue that maybe she wanted him more, but I think the answer is more that I could have made out with her initially had I done it properly, had I done it strongly. It's too bad we both could have opened our girls strongly from the get go as that would have been a good set for something to happen since we had 2 girls stopped.

Obliterating the fear of the kiss close:
The main lesson here is that I need no longer fear of going for the kiss close. I've gotten so much better at it, but there were time, like with that redhead two Saturdays ago in Wicker, when I was hesitant to go for the kiss. You have go make some sort of move when the sets pops. It's I've developed a strong connection to the girl and she wants to kiss me. There's also times when the girl is high buying temperature and I've created strong attraction from the get go and she wants to be kissed (like that older blonde on Friday).

I know I'm going to be more decisive when that moment comes. Even when I have gone for the kiss, I often have procrastinated going for it, but at least I was better than years ago when I'd bust out sets by not going for it. Now, I see myself busting out of fewer sets from failure to kiss, and also just making things seem more magical when I go for the kiss at just the right moment when the window opens.

I feel like the calibration is in there in that I'm usually good at picking up when the window has opened. I just lacked the balls sometime to go for it and I sometimes just didn't trust that my read was correct.

How the fuck can I fear going for a kiss when I can sense the time is right when I just proved to myself Sunday that I can open random girls and kiss them within seconds? That's a rhetorical question. It's such a breakthrough for me to have execute the Jeffy opener so many time in one day. I think to myself, "Wow, I really used to fear going for the kiss that much, yet it really is this easy to just go kiss girls?!?"

Drunken day game opener that I sabotaged:
Right as we were about to take the train back, I stopped this moving set who had headphones on. This is a good reference point despite my eventual quick screw up. I could tell the girl was sober and hadn't been at the festival. I opened her by just trying to stop her like I would a set in day time when I was sober. She surprised me by taking out her headphones and talking to me. She saw me and wanted to talk to me. A third party observer might think, "Duh! Of course she wants to talk to a high value guy like you" but it doesn't often feel like that when I'm in the process of doing it. Again, I have to work on having a better frame. I really was thinking she was gonna walk by; if I truly believe I'm enough, I should instead expect that she's gonna stop.

It was obvious I was drunk and little incoherent from the 24+ hours of being up. Still, we was engaging and we were having a conversation. I should have just went for a quick number close when we vibed on museums or whatever it was. Instead, I stalled cause I barely had the energy to keep talking and then of course she walked off.

This is great reference material because despite my condition, she stopped and was friendly to me and I even had a number close possibility if I did it before I stalled out. Had I been sober or not that tired, I know I wouldn't have stalled. This set made me realize that I play up day game too much. I know from Free Tours talks and other community stuff that day game is supposed to be easier and lead to a higher percentage of non flake Day 2's and number closes, yet I guess I remember when I used to do day game when I sucked.

That's another reason I should embrace day game though. I'm thinking back to how I got my first Day 2 from cold approach from a day game opinion opener in the bookstore. If I could do it then, I can surely do it now, and community wisdom says it should be cake for me now that I'm owning the clubs (which is a way harder place to game.)

Lessons for festival game:
Nintendo said that where we screwed up is the down time in between opening. We need to just constantly hit up sets and we gain more momentum. I agree. I also think that next time will be easier because we can build from the successes of this first attempt. I also will not be in zombie mode. If I can make this happen with no sleep and in a shit state, then crazy things will happen when I'm my usual party self. I just text Nintendo that we should consider going to Milwaukee Summerfest.




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