I've been having a good week but part of me needed some result to prove to myself that I'm actually living the PUA lifestyle. Yes, you shouldn't worry too much about results, but after awhile it feels good to experience some. The title is somewhat deceptive but I didn't put the "fuck up" part in the title cause I'm not feeling that pain that I often feel when a set gets screwed up late. I don't feel like I did last Saturday when I messed up that pull.
I started the night by meeting up with some college friends. I definitely have insane social momentum now because before Nintendo even showed up, I was dancing up on girls downstairs while completely sober. What a difference between me at Famous Freddies a month ago and me tonight.
Nintendo showed up and he opened one set at this bar but there really wasn't anything else. We walked across the street and opened this seated 2-set. We had a great time just talking to the girls. Nintendo has excellent group game. He kept saying stuff that would make both girls and I laugh. I'm sure some of it is the vibe but it's definitely a skill I lack. I think back to what Sidegames said about me years ago: I'm good with stories. I can get laughs when I recount some interesting thing that happened to me, but I'm not good with spontaneous comments about randoms stuff to generate laughs.
At one point, I build up some good rapport with the girl I was talking two who I'll call "Red." I was happy with the way things broke down cause of course I love redheads. Nintendo seemed focused on the girl with shorts who I'll call "Shorts." Maybe I screwed up with moment. I was seated and she was standing next to me. I put my arm around her and we were gazing into each others eyes. It felt like a kiss close moment, and if I had been drunk I think I probably would have kissed her, but I wasn't sure about doing it now because we weren't isolated. Even if I didn't kiss close, I think I could have improved about the moment by stroking her face.
When they say they have to go...
Nintendo, fortunately, has a strength that complements my weakness. We were in the set for over an hour. I was trying to figure out what the next move was with these girls. My mind thought maybe we could try for drinks at their place but before I had to come to a decision, or likely indecision, Nintendo talked about going to the after hours place down the street. Red said she had to wake up early for work. The conversation drifted again, and then everyone closed out the tabs. Nintendo mentioned the after hours.
I can give myself some credit as I at least did something valuable. It had been raining all night and still was at this moment. Red said, "I don't know about walking down the block, I don't wanna get soaked." Before she said this, I had seen these free newspapers by the entrance and I planned on using them to avoid getting wet. I said, "I already figured that out" and I brought the newspapers over. She kept making jokes about the paper later and appreciated my move.
What's needy and what's persistent?
Here's my ADD kicking in. As I'm writing this, I decided to do a search on the rsdnation.com forums to get some theory on what's the difference between being persistent and needy? I think part of me fears persisting cause I'm afraid of being needy and then I just end up losing the set.
It's funny that I was actually there as this venue changed happened and I'm still trying to analyze what happened. I haven't read the links but I'm thinking that needy would be begging them, "Come on. Please come."
I think the move I have to ingrain in my head is that the girls closed their check and Nintendo said, "Okay, let's go to that bar," and he started leading his girl out the door. I suppose it's exactly like when you want to lead a girl to another part of the club. You grab her hand and you say, "Let's go to (the bar, the dance floor, whatever)" and you start leading her. If she holds your hand like a dead fish, then you drop her hand but you start walking like you expect her to follow. I did this the other day when I got these girls at Lion Head to go upstairs. I had to drop her hand, but I remember turning around to check to make sure they were following. One girls stalled and I said, "Let's go" and waved them over and they came upstairs.
Red's not into me and it seems like we're switching targets:
I had that moment with Red but she seemed to not be into me during the venue change. I'm wondering if I should have went outside with her when she went to smoke. If things had been more on, I think I would have as I know it's easy isolation. In this case, I didn't want to stand in the rain and be around smoke. I figured I'd blow out any guy that might sarge her so I was cool with hanging at the table.
I tried to get her to sit down next to me but she was in high energy mode and kept dancing to the music. A few times I went to dance with her but she kept pulling back when I tried to escalate.
One time, she started to run off and said she was checking out the back. I'll give myself some credit for just deciding to go with her. She stopped in front of this Latino dude that had complimented her outside and started dancing by him. I let her do it for 5 seconds, then I came over and pulled her away. In back, I tried to get her to sit down and get isolation but she said she didn't want to sit. She wanted to do shots and I agreed. Part of me didn't want to but I felt I would be breaking the vibe too much. I did keep the frame when she tried to mess with me. She gave me shit about doing a vodka shot and I know a chump would change what he was getting. Fuck that. I'll get what I want.
At one point, Nintendo started talking to Red. She was dancing more enthusiastically with him. I told Nintendo that she must like Latino guys. I started talking to Shorts. Shorts was actually cool. She's travelled the world so we had a ton to talk about. I did some minor kino escalation by touching her hand, but I couldn't do much as I was sitting across the table. I was thinking maybe I should say, "I can't hear you well" and used that as an excuse to sit next to her.
I was cool with switching targets, but the indecision here I think hurt us later. I knew I wasn't Red's type, but I knew with 2-set theory that if we did this right, she'd be happy to mess around with me.
We have to go home:
Here is where I really need the debrief. It FUCKING AMAZES me that we wound up at their apartment. (I forgot to mention that Shorts and Red were roommates). Just as we're having confusion with the targets and I'm talking to Shorts, the girls mention that they have to go, again cause Red has to get up early. Red wanders off to say bye to that Latino guy she danced by. Nintendo starts talking to Shorts.
I think it had something to do with smoking weed. I remember Nintendo telling me, "I'm pretty sure this girl wants to fuck me so you go for the girl with white pants (Red). We're gonna go smoke with these girls."
I remember Nintendo talking to Shorts and having his arm around her. Someone mentions grabbing the friend so I go over and grab Red. Since I knew she wasn't that into me, I grabbed her arm and said, "Your friend is looking for you" and then lead her out.
We start walking up the road. I'm walking with Red and Nintendo and Shorts are ahead of us. There's this big black dude talking on the phone in front of one of the other bars and drunk Red stops and starts dancing in front of him. She says, "Come on, show me what you've got. Show me your moves." He's just laughing at her. I'm laughing too but then I put my arm around her and say, "Your friend is up there. Let's go."
Finally, when we turn the corner at this big intersection, she starts being less standoffish. I put my arm around her for a bit as I put the newspaper over her to keep her dry. She says her feet her and I give her a piggy back ride for about two blocks till I get tired, but fortunately we're close to their place at that point.
Before I go on, I have to get back to the point of my weakness. When the girls said "We're going" I figured this shit was over. I'm so dumb that I hadn't even number closed and we would have just lost the set there. That's basically what happened last Saturday, except that girl gave me her number without me asking.
Again, it AMAZES me that I'm thinking the set is over and then suddenly, Nintendo talks to the girl for like 30 seconds and we're heading to their place.
I can't rely on my wing to do this. I need to pick up on this skill cause I need to lead on solo sets and I shouldn't rely on my wing to do shit for me.
(As I'm writing this, I think about how Seagull and I extracted these blacks girls to food last year and I guess I need to remember how I've been when I've pulled and be that guy when the time comes again in the future.)
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