I wrote in my last post that gave my best effort this past week. I've gotten so many positive reference points this week. There were times when I was just stunned that I could have doubted myself for this long. As I think I wrote two weeks ago, I haven't even been close to this level of being centered since back around Christmas.
I'm at a new level compared to Christmas though. I really am in awe when I think back on some of good interactions I've had this past week. I'm thinking to myself, "Wow, I can't believe how hot some of these girls are that have been giving me good reactions." I've gotten a little tease of what can be possible.
I'm going to write later about how for a short period, my interaction with this really hot, tall brunette was just perfect. I was kinoing her and she was touching me back. I was teasing her verbally in a way that was creating even more attraction (and every now that is usually a weak spot in my game). I was physically dominate with her in a way that really pumped her state.
Besides that, I was just calm and collected with so many of the sets I was in this week. I can't believe how comfortable I was approaching, holding eye contact, and just interacting with hot girls that I often could barely open in the past. These are girls that my solid wings would admit they often would be intimidated to even open (save for Seagull, who opened a few of these sets, and Crazyfoot). These are girls that would be considered some of the hottest ones we'd see on any given night.
Every night, there have been several girls just gazing into me eyes with desire. Often, these have been girls I desired, and not some chubby girl that I didn't really want (which is what I'd usually get in the past).
I swear as I write this, part of me is still struggling to accept that I could have come this far from where I started so long ago, and from the depths that my game recently fell to due to shitty inner game.
Girls have been intimidated by me. That's something that I feel so weird writing. There was this set at the end of the night Saturday that I realized kept giving me a hard time because she didn't feel qualified to be with a guy like me. I feel weird writing because that's something that sounds so cocky, but I don't mean to talk about it in that way.
I think back to where I started and where I was recently when I was full of self doubt. That's where the girls are on pedestals. That's where I think I'm not worthy of the good looking girls. That's where I think I need to DHV myself so she'll think I'm worthy.
Imagine going from that mind set, and suddenly you find yourself, and all this seemingly crazy stuff of this past week happens to you.
I'm thinking, "Wow, that guy that even for a brief moment this past night, stood there playing with his phone, afraid to open. That guy that doubted and hesitated so many times is now the guy that girls desire. Multiple girls are gazing into my eyes."
On Friday, there was this HB7 that I started talking to me that shoved me into her two hotter friends telling me, "These two are looking for a boyfriend."
That seems crazy to me.
Now, if I keep going out and keep doing what I've been doing, I know this stuff is going to keep happening. The question is how do I take things further. I want to be making out with these smoking hot girls. I want to pull one of them.
I have to work on creating that feeling that something special is going on, and I have to kino more. I'll hit the gym and then write that post.
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