Instructor Advice & I was in da hood

I'm glad I posted my field report because I ended up getting a response from Jeffy. Here's the link.. The main critique was "too much talking, too much acknowledgement of her objections. Too much 'convincing.'" You gotta love the forums: I actually got solid advice from one of the instructors that I look up to on RSD. For some reason, I kept thinking I had to have a response for all the BS objections girls throw out when I've tried to pull. I think it's because the first apartment pull with G two years ago involved a lot of convincing, as did my first SNL pull.

I suppose I had some feeling that I was doing that wrong. Back when I met "Purple Shirt Girl," I remember writing that the girl exclaimed, "I had an answer for everything she said." I thought that was a good thing, but then again, I also remember writing how scatterbrained I was with a pull plan. I threw out like a bunch of different ideas: come have pizza at my place, let's grab food, let's have food at your place, let's go to the car. Keeping Jeffy's advice in mind, I need to just pick something, and just tell the girl let's go. He said to blow off any objections with "yeah,yeah" and just keep leading.

Thinking about Saturday's set, I probably could have had her ditch the friends, especially after we made out while waiting to get the phone. Sure, it sucked that I had to take the train, but I could have just lead her to the train and then to my car. Alternatively, I guess I could have just said keep driving and said the exit to my house.

Obviously, I'm just gonna need to keep practicing and try to follow Jeffy's post and I'll get better at this. It's good to have a framework now.

I was in the hood:
I kind of suspected I was in the hood Saturday. Two of my friends used to go to the West Side to buy drugs so they know where that area is. I figured there would be shitty cars but my one friend said that's not always the case. You see some nice cars there. Also, since it was 5am, the streets were pretty empty. During peak hours, people are just standing around and hanging out all over. I've seen a glimpse of that when I used to drive down Garfield Blvd on the South Side to get to school. I remember driving by the Maxwell place on Independence and I remember that's near the area where my buddy said was the hood.

I'll close with an old NWA song below. BTW, I actually have been in Compton. There is a casino called Crystal Palace which is in Compton, so technically I've been in Compton and slept in Compton. Of course, it's safe there and I was never in the actual bad area. The casino is right off the freeway. The one thing I remember of the California casinos is that the security guards actually carry guns unlike in Illinois or Indiana.

Almost pull shorter RSD version+Girl's text

I wanted to try to get feedback on RSD so I created a shorter version and posted my first Field report there. In follows as written below. I also include a text which may be a clue to where I really went wrong.

The RSD link is here:

This is my first Field Report that I'm posting her on the forums. Every night I go out, I write field reports in my blog by I usually just write them for myself as I can analyze every detail and figure out what I did wrong and know what I did correctly. As things are finally clicking, I'm finding myself in more mid to late game situations and I now find myself unsure about certain things. Here I am to get some advice from the more experienced people out there. I'm trying to write a short version of my novel length FR in my blog for this forum.

I know this is long, so I posted my key questions at the bottom. Those that don't have the patience to read can just skip down there and address those if possible.

My original plan for the night was to hang out and get drunk at my buddy's birthday BBQ. I had to drive to his house which is about a 15-20 minute expressway drive. The train is like a 40 minutes ride to where my wing and I were planning to go out that night. I took the train in and ended up going on this Day 2. I thought I was gonna hook up with the girl on thie Day 2, but it ended up not going well. I can't say I total fucked it up, but she wasn't responding to my kino and left after two drinks. She did have to go to a cousin's birthday or so she had said we we got there. I tried to get her to bring me along but she didn't want to. I only mention this because I know several wings that would have gone home after this shitty Day 2. I did feel like just taking the train back and driving home but I was out near the bars so I decided to sarge, even though it was gonna be solo sarging. I've had success solo sarging but I always feel less motivated to go solo sarging than when I have a good wing meeting me.

I busted out quickly out of a lot of sets at my first bar. I went to my second bar. The upstairs area is like one huge dance floor. I accidentally bumped into this cute black girl. I should note that I have 4 types of girls that really turn me on right now: 1)natural red heads with the pale skin (even chunky ones) 2) 6 foot tall girls 3) black girls 4) really short girls say 4'11". I apologized and actually turned to walk away when I caught myself. "Wait a minute, this girl is cute." I turned back around and introduced myself. We started dancing. My girl was the best looking girl in the set. There were three other girls: a chunky Latina Mother Hen, and two larger black girls. I introduced myself to the other girls early on (within a minute). I spun two of the friends after a song just so they didn't feel left out. I isolated her to the bar area just by saying, "Let's take a break. It's hot (btw, this place is so cheap that it's ridiculously hot up there and it's nasty to bump into people cause everyone is sweaty). Let's go to the bar." I wrote in my blog that I often don't isolate enough and now that I'm trying to focus on it, it surprises me how easy it is to do it (cause I always felt it was a hard thing to do). We talked and built rapport. She loves to travel which always gains a girl points in my book.

After a few minutes of talking, we started dancing again and she said, "Do you wanna go back to my friends?" I lead her back there. We danced for a few more songs. Some dudes started to grind on the other girls and Mother Hen didn't like one guy so she pulled them all away. It was a good sign when my target grabbed my arm as she was getting dragged off. They started dancing again. After a little bit, I tried to isolate my girl to this fan area. She came with but then I noticed the whole set had followed us. Mother Hen actually tried to cockblock me after a few songs. She had pulled my girl away and danced with her a few times. I had just danced by myself and my girl came back after dancing with Mother Hen. At one point, though she said, "I'm taking my girlfriend back" and gave me this cold look. I told her to give me a high five. She didn't react and tried to say it again. My girl reached for me as this was happening so I knew it was on anyway. I just used Tyler's old line on Mother Hen, "I wanna adopt you as my little sister. You are so fiesty! I like you." Mother Hen giggled. After this, I made sure to take a little bit of time to dance with the other girls.

I knew closing time was coming so I tried to figure out logistics and tried to seed the pull. I also knew I had to make out with this girl. As I said, my car was stuck a 40 minute "L" ride away. My girl was from a neighboring state that was a 5 hour drive Sunday (and it was like 3am at this point). She was staying in the city. Later, I found out it was about 10 minutes from my car. They had all driven to the bar in one of the girl's car. I started to seed the pull by asking her what they were doing afterwards. She said they were probably going to eat. I tried talking up some nearby diners but Mother Hen just blew off my suggestions. (Later I learned it was cause she wanted to meet a close friend that she doesn't see often at the particular diner we ended up going to). While dancing with my girl, I told her, "You should come over and hang out after this." I said that I lived west (I'm close to the city limits but my place is like a 20 minute drive from anywhere we actually go sarge in the city) and my car was off the Blue Line. My plan at the time was to get her to come on the train and take that to my car. I realized it would be hard to keep her buying temp up that whole time but that was my best option. I tried to kiss her on the dance floor. She let me kiss her neck and bite her neck but wouldn't let me kiss her. I thought it was because her friends were around. I even went for it when guys were grinding on the other girls. I verbalized, "Your friends aren't looking" and went for it, but no go.

When the bar closed, Mother Hen said, "Let's go" and grabbed my girls hand and started leading her away. My girl held on to my hand and I follow them. I tried grabbing the hand of one of the other girls but she wouldn't take it. We got outside. My girl said they were going to their car and then to the restaurant. I figured I could go along and then either get dropped off near the Blue Line (which would save me like 20-30 minutes of riding and transfering from the Red Line) or maybe get dropped off by my car.

Mother Hen find a cab. She got in the front seat. I knew that I needed to avoid being the last to get in the cab. I didn't want the three to be in the back seat and then Mother Hen could say, "Oh well. No room. Sorry." My girl got in the cab, then I got in. One of the other girls was getting in when Mother Hen turned back and saw me.

She squawked, "Why is this Chinaman here?" (I'm Filipino, btw.) I just smiled.
My girl said, "'Cause he's coming with."
Mother hen objected, "Why?"
My girl said firmly, "Because he is."
The dynamics of this set changed after this moment. I could see that my girl had established that she liked me and this was going down. Mother Hen no longer tried to cockblock me after this.

About two blocks away, one of the friends in the back seat makes the cab stop. She realized she lost her phone and wants to look for it at the bar. She gets out. Mother Hen (I gotta say that she does look out for her friends well) asked if anyone was gonna go with her. My girl said she was gonna go with so we got out. This ended up helping me. I got to show some alpha qualities by leading the lost phone girl to the correct entrance to get in. Later, I looked up the cell phone company number to get her phone suspended. More importantly, I finally got real isolation as my girl and I waited on the sidewalk. I remember that her back was against the wall. I was close to her. I was facing her and holding her hands. I looked deeply into her eyes. The sexual tension was building but she tried to break it by saying something like, "Why are you looking at me like that?" I think I just smiled. I took my left hand and started stroking her face. I stopped stroking her face and held my hand against her cheek and went in for the kiss. She kissed me and we started making out. I stopped it, looked at her, and then we started again. This time I pushed her more dominately against the wall and pinned her left had against the wall. Then I pulled back and I noticed the two friends in the cab were walking up as they had just gotten dropped off by thecab.

I write in my blog that certain things hurt me that were out of my control. One was this insanely long walk to the car. I had asked where the car was and they said it was walking distance as they had walked to the bar. Had I known where it was, I would have gotten a cab. I just googled the distanced and it was 1.5 miles. I was able to talk to my girl and we held hands the whole way but every got sober from the long walk and being at the restaurant.

We got to the restaurant. I had my arm around my girl in the car but I didn't try to kiss her there. I was worried it would make her uncomfortable doing that stuff in front of the friends. At the restaurant, Mother Hen's friend and some guy met us there. I ended up sitting with my girl on one side and the guy on the right side. The guy was cool and I talked to him for like 5 minutes. Then, I had to force myself to stop talking to him and focus on my girl. As she was eating, the only kino I did was I rubbed her leg under the table. She was cool with it. The two new friends actually left early as they had a long drive. When everyone was nearly done eating, I again told my girl we should come to my place and hang out. My girl paid with her card so we had to wait up by the register to pay. This gave me isolation. She said she was getting tired. I told her that we needed to get to my car and then we'd come hang out for a little bit and I'd make sure she got home early. (I actually thought several of the girls were all driving together but it turns out only my girl was driving to the nearby state today.) I told her she could tell her friends that she was going to watch the sunrise with me. As we were walking out, she said she could get dropped off by her car and then we'd drive to my car.

Again, I just held her hand and rubbed her arm in the car. When we got to her car, Mother Hen started to give me a hard time. She said she wanted to take a picture of my ID. I tried to tell her I'd give her my phone number. She did have a point. I was just some random guy my friend met at the bar and while I was cool, she was looking out for her friend. I just wanted them to leave and I did understand what she was trying to do, so I let her. (BTW, these girls didn't seem shady. The have good jobs and the friend was driving a nice Mercedes. The only thing I don't like about the ID is that the girl could google me and find out some shit she might not like about me.)

I got in my girl's car. She was having trouble starting it, but finally it started. My advice actually worked to give it gas as the problem seemed similar to one I had before. I think I made a mistake here in that I should have told her to kiss me. If we had started making out there, maybe it would have been easier to get her to drive to my place. We caught a light and I looked over and thought about trying to kiss her. This was a new situation. The few times I've pulled involving a car, I've been driving. I thought about trying to kiss her as I could tell she was tired and even asked, "What's wrong?" I don't know why I didn't initate a make out right there.

My car and my place are on the same direction on the expressway. My car was about 8-10 minutes from where her car was. My house was probably double that. She was driving for 5 minutes before she started to ask me where my car was. (BTW, as I write this post, I think I should have talked more in the car. I wasn't totally silent, but there were moments of silence. I'm thinking maybe if I had kept blabbering, and I have enough stories that I tell that I could have filled the time, maybe she wouldn't have asked about the exit until we were close to the exit to my place.) We actually were at the closest exit to my car but I bought myself time by saying it was the next exit. I actually did start to talk and as we got to the exit, I tried saying, "Let's just go to my place. It's only 10 mins from here." She objected about having to drive 5 hours in the morning. I said she could take a nap. She got off at the exit to my car.

I'm wondering if I should have lied and said the exit to my car was the exit to my house. I guess I was worried that she'd start bitching that it was too far or get mad that I was tricking her. I wonder now if I would have pulled her here if had said my house exit was where my car was.

We got to my car and I told her to pull behind it. She was like 2-3 feet from the curb and had the light on and engine running. She said we could keep in touch and hang out again. I figured it was gonna be like this girl I talk to from a few weeks ago. I wanted to try to have sex tonight because I figured it would be months before she came back and she'd either forget about me or I'd have to maintain a text relationship that whole time. I kissed her and we started making out. I started to escalate more by kissing her neck, sucking and biting her neck, and feeling her boobs. When she was getting into it, I pulled back and said, "Let's drive to my place." She said the two times I tried it, "I can't." The second time, she made the objection, "I have to get some rest." I said, "You can sleep in the extra bedroom." She replied, "We're not gonna sleep if we go over there."

Maybe it was a mistake to respond, "Probably not." I actually escalated way faster than I normally would. After touching her boobs for like 10 seconds, I started to run my hands up her skirt. I rubbed her pussy for a few seconds and she actually didn't resist. I stopped though and tried saying, "Pull over by my car." I'm thinking that maybe I should have really started rubbing her pussy and fingering her. I guess I had an issue with us being like 3 feet from the curb, with our headlights on, the car running, and dawn upon us.

I tried escalating again but she was less into it and had decided that this really wasn't gonna happen. We exchanged numbers. I kissed her again. I asked, "When are you coming back here?" She said, "Two weeks."

I actually thought, "Whoops. Maybe I didn't have to go for broke."

Let me close with a text I got from her as I was driving home. It made me realize that maybe my problem was one that I didn't even think of the whole time.

I like you... I'm just not down for the whole one night stand thing :(

Maybe my screw up was that I created what Tim called the "Cherish" relationship in "Flawless Natural." Thinking about it, maybe the whole hand holding the whole time was a bad idea. Fortunately, she might be back in town soon and I can build off this. Still, when going for SNL, I need to work more on being a sexual man.

Summary of questions:
1) Was the better move to try to not go to the diner and just try to get her to my car/my place? If I had my car near the bar, I think that was the move, but given that the girls giving me a ride makes thing way e convenient, I think I was stuck.
2) I think my big mistake was not making out with her once I got in her car. I think her buying temperature dropped and made her not want to come over.
3) When she asked me what exit my car was at, should I have lied and just told her the exit to my house? I tried telling her it was 10 minutes away but it might have been 15 mins away. I was worried she would start bitching cause it would take too long.
4) Should I have just started really trying to rub her pussy despite the fact that car was running, with the light on, halfway in the middle of this side street?
5) Advice on not creating a "cherish" relationship?
6) Any other feedback on my night. Also, I welcome feedback on the FR format: like what details I can leave out to make it shorter or any details I'm missing. (I feel this is long, but my original one I wrote for my blog was way longer.)

"Why is China man in here?"-Close to a pull with my 1st black girl

Originally, I was just gonna write this report in my Bombed Day 2 report, but that one got too long. This deserves it's own entry anyway. As I said in my last entry, tonight I was persistent. I could have gone home after I had a poor Day 2, but instead I decided to go sarge since I was out in Wrigley already. I walked in and busted out of several sets in my first bar.

You're too close, man:
There actually was one set that was on after the opening. There was this cute blonde sitting at a table. She seemed bored. On the other side of this table were 4 girls bunched together. I assumed it was a 5 set. I opened pretty strong and I was up close to her. She responded positively. Suddenly this bouncer came up and said, "You're too close,man." I gave him this WTF?! look. I felt mixed emotions at that moment. For a second, I doubted myself. I thought about the Day 2 and wondered if I was really miscalibrated tonight. I had bombed several sets already and here was some bouncer giving me shit. I felt that emotion for about a second and I also got pissed. I was thinking, "Who the fuck does this guy think he is trying to tell me how close to stand to girls?" I felt like how I did 2 months ago when this cunt waitress at Debonaire told me I wasn't allowed to talk to tables.

I guess I put out my usual confident vibe though. After I gave him this WTF? look, I just stood there and then he said, "That's my girlfriend." I asked her, "Is that really your boyfriend?" She said it was so then I just said, "Okay" and left. It made sense. She had said she wasn't with the large group and why else would the bouncer say something to me? Plus, she confirmed what he had said.

I really have changed:
In many ways, I'm so much different than I used to be. It's amazes me when I think about it. I think about this poster on RSD who keeps complaining and making excuses for why he's getting poor results after only 5 months in the game. In fact, he even seems to be creeping out the girls. I see myself in him and the funny thing is that I think I started out being at an even worse level than he did. Guys used to tell me that either you were good with girls or you weren't. Once again, I am so lucky that Amazon.com recommended "The Game" to me six years ago or I would have never found the community and changed my life.

I think about the bouncer situation above. Until recently, I would have ran off all scared that he said something to me. Instead, I'm looking at him funny and just standing in the same place until I figure out what's going on.

I think about how my nights have been recently. Almost every night I'm getting make outs now and getting near pulls. This used to just happen with fat girls, but now I'm starting to get results with girls I really find attractive. I can see how this will turn out if I keep at this. Eventually, I'm sure I'll be writing something like this expressing my amazement at how often I can pull.


"I'm sorry." "Oh, my name is Pokerpua."
I knew that closing time was nearing. I thought it was like 30 minutes away but it ended up being longer than that. I forgot that the Wrigley places stay open almost till the actual closing time as opposed to the BS on Division where it closes at say, 5am, but they kick everyone out at like 4:20-4:30. I decided to go to our usual giant dance floor place. I figured I could work some dance floor game plus it's so loud and crowded that I'd have plenty of opportunities to try my silly, hard open, extremely fast escalation game.

I walked around the lower level. I can't even remember why I didn't open there. I was still drunk, but I think there weren't any obvious sets. I think it was a bunch of mixed sets that I didn't feel like dealing with. There was no line to the second floor so I went upstairs. The first set I stopped was some brunette who was wandering alone. I love those sets as I've had some success with them in that very venue. A friend showed up before I even hooked it and pulled her away.

I went around some guy after than and accidentally bumped into this little black girl. I do the alpha walk through the crowd but if I bump into someone I apologize. I feel like it's rude not to do so. I think you can walk around like you own the place but still be polite if you bump into someone. Anyway, I said, "I'm sorry" and then I was about to walk away. I had actually turned my back to her, and then I thought to myself, "WTF? She's cute. Open her." I turned around and introduced myself.

We starting dancing and immediately I could tell she was into me. I can't even describe it. It's calibration from practicing dance floor game. It had to do with the way she responded to me when I started dancing with her and her response to the spin. She started grinding with me, but I realized she was into me before that. This girl was in a large set. There were two other black girls and this Latina who turned out to be the mother hen. They were just letting me grind with her, but Ozzie's lessons from "Transformations" still stick with me. He says you have to dance all the girls. He says to grind them all, but I didn't go that. I introduced myself to the friends within a minute. A song later, I think I spun two of the girls. I then decided to isolate her briefly.

Isolation:
Isolation is key and I know I need to practice it more. A big part of setting up a pull is leading the girl around the club. I remember thinking, "I gotta move this girl and talk to her." The talking to her is key too so, as Ozzie says, you don't become dance partner for the night. I said, "Let's go to the bar and take a break." This particular bar is so fucking hot upstairs that every gets soaked with sweat. She needed the break. I dragged her near the bar. I put my arm around her and we started to talk. She has the travel bug and of course that got her points.

We talked for a bit. Then we started dancing where we were talking and then she said, "Do you wanna go back to my friends?" I lead her back there. Later, I'd try to isolate her by the fans.

Cock blocking:
I thought I had neutralized the friends. I word it like that for a reason. I think there's a difference between actually "befriending" the friends and neutralizing them. For example, when we were at the diner, I could have told stories and dominated the conversation and had the friends thinking I was awesome. Maybe I should have done that but I did enough. In this dance floor situation, I could have really spread my dancing among all the girls but I just danced with them a little bit.

After I had moved her to the fan area, the girls had followed me. Prior to that, some dudes had started grinding up on the other girls. The Latina chick got sick of one dude and lead all the girls away from that group. I knew it was on with my girl so I just followed. By the fans, I danced with my girl for several songs. The Latina girl had pulled my girl in a few times. I'd let them dance and just danced by myself. One time, she did it and tried to cockblock me. She said something like, "Okay, I'm gonna take my girlfriend back." She gave me this firm look. That girl is the fiesty Latina girl who has the Spanish temper.

I could see myself leaving the set in the past as I would have felt I was busted out. I said, "Give me a high five." She didn't exactly budge after that move. She held firm and then I said, "You are fiesty. I like that. I gotta adopt you." That broke the ice. Besides that, my girl grabbed my arm as this was going down as she didn't want me to leave. After this incident, I danced with all the girls a for a few seconds (like 15 seconds each), just so I felt like I was showing them attention.

Seeding the pull:
I knew closing time was coming, so I had begun to work logistics while I was dancing with her. Mine were shitty. My car was parked off the Blue Line in Oak Park. I figured I could have the girl take the train with me if necessary and then I could drive to my place. I found out she lived closer to downtown, but it turned out she only lived like 10 minutes from where I was parked. At the time, I thought they were all staying at the same house, but it turns out they weren't.

I asked her what she was going after this place closed. She said they were probably getting something to eat. I tried to sell Clarke's but the Latina girl kept rejecting it. Later, I would learn it was because she wanted to meet some friend at the restaurant we ended up eating at.

I told her several times, "We should hang out after this. I'm off the blue line."

Another thing I had to do was escalate more. Sure, we were grinding, but I needed more than that. I wanted to kiss her. She actually resisted kissing. I figured it was cause of the friends being there. I couldn't get isolation from them as it was almost closing time plus, the last time I tried the move, they just followed us. Some dudes started grinding with the girls again and they were into it. This is when I started to escalate more. I already made a good move of trying to grind her crotch with my leg when we were dancing while facing each other. At this point, I started to maneuver her so our facing would be facing each other. When we held eye contact, she'd hold it for a few seconds, smile, and then face down.

I went for the kiss one of those times and ended up kissing her face. She liked what I was doing though as when she'd turn her face down, she'd move closer and put her head into my chest and shoulder. One of these times, I started kissing her neck. I gave her a playful bite on the neck and I blew air onto her ear. Later, I tried kissing her again and even said, "You're friends can't see."

"Why is this China man in here?"
The place closed and mother hen started to lead the girls out of there. I had told my girl again that we should hang out after this. Mother hen was leading my girl by holding her hand, but she was holding my hand. The two other friends were following. Later, I'd pull them along by grabbing their hand. If my car had been there, I think the move would have been to try to get her to my car and then to my house. I found out they had a car here so I was hoping to get a ride with them. Mother hen kept talking about going to this one restaurant so I figured I was stuck with doing that.

Mother hen lead the group down the street and eventually they found an open cab. Mother hen got in the front seat (of course, cause she's mother hen...). My girl got in the back seat and I got in with her.

I should note that I might have hesitated at this spot worried if this was gonna be okay. I knew it was because my girl was holding on to me. In my mind, though, I had made a subtle play here. There were 5 of us. What I didn't want to happen was to have the 3 girls get in and then I'd have to try to squeeze in the back. It would be easy for mother hen, or any of the girls to just say, "Sorry, no room."

As the two other girls were getting in, Mother Hen (I realize that both words should be capitalized since I'm use that term as her name, but I'm not gonna fix what I've already written) suddenly realized I was in the cab.

She squawked, "Why is China man in here?!"

I think I just smiled. My girl said something like, "Cause he's coming with."
Mother hen objected, "Why?"
My girl said firmly, "Cause he is."

Mother hen that realized this was going down. My girl stood up so I could squeeze under her and have her sit in my lap. Now the other girls could get in.

Some things are out of you control:
There were several factors that were out of my control tonight that made the pull less likely to happen. As I'm writing this, I realize that I need to drive when I go into the city. Tonight I couldn't have driven as I wanted to get drunk at my buddy's party and still go sarge. Because of that, I was stuck going to eat. Maybe I couldn't have convinced her to ditch the food even if my car had been there, but being stuck with the girls means I couldn't even push that angle.

A really shitty thing was that one of the girls realized in the cab that she had lost her phone. She got out and my girl and I got out to go back to the bar. The other two girls ended up circling around and got dropped off by the bar.

Another factor was that my girl was from Iowa though she has family here. On top of that, she was leaving today. That was a negative and she kept saying that's why she couldn't come over in the end. That was legitimate, but her text at the end explained another reason. I might have to make another entry there.

Finally, these drunks girls parked so far away yet they thought it was walking distance. The distance we walked was from next to Wrigley Field (Addison and Clark) to near Duffy's. Let's just call it Diversey and Halsted. I tried asking Mother Hen were the car was but she never gave me exact streets. She had just said it was close. We should have taken a cab there and this ate up time that could have meant me getting a lay.

This Entry is so long...
I realize that the novel-length of this makes this hard to read. I actually want to condense this report cause I want to get feedback from RSD on what happened tonight.

Finally get a make out:
Maybe the phone actually helped me. I got to show some alpha qualities in directing the girl to the correct door to talk to the bouncer about looking for her phone. I also was able to look up the number for the girl to call when she had to have the line suspended. Mother hen had tried to look it up but couldn't figure it out before I did. The biggest way it helped me was it gave me about five minutes of actual isolation time.

As the girl was inside looking for the phone, my girl and I waited on the sidewalk. She was leaning against the wall and I was standing in front of her. I remember looking into her eyes. We were holding eye contact and sexual tension was brewing. She tried to break the tension by saying something like, "Why are you looking at me like that?" I didn't respond. I was holding her hand with my right hand. With my left hand, I started stroking her face. Props to "Philly" (one of the cool guys we went out with occasionally a few years ago) to making me realize back then how good that makes a woman feel when you do that. When I feel like I have to create the kiss, I remember his lesson about that move.

Sometimes, I feel like this moment just happens where it's obvious it's time to kiss the girl. With all the fear I had, especially back in the AFC Days, sometimes the moment is so strong that you just kiss the girl despite the fear. That happens sometimes when I'm out sarging. It seems like often times, I have to create this moment to make the kiss happen. That's how it felt when we were standing there.

I stroked her face and then I stopped stroking and held my hand against her face. I then leaned in and kiss her. She accepted it and then we started making out. I pulled back and we started making out again. I stopped it again and then suddenly I saw that Mother Hen and the other girl had gotten dropped off and were back.

Restaurant state break and persistence:
We sat down to eat. Another Latina girl and this young black college kid had met us there. They were friends of Mother Hen. I talked to the dude a bit. He was cool and I actually had to make a conscious decision to stop talking to him so I wasn't ignoring my girl. I debated above how I could have spoken loudly and tried to run a dinner conversation by telling stories or whatever. If I was in that mood, I suppose that was one option but I think my chill version was fine. I befriend the dude even though it was unnecessary as the new Latina girl and he ended up having to leave early since they had a long drive.

My target was eating but I talked to her. I couldn't hold her hand or put her arm around her while she was eating. I moved my chair closing and just starting rubbing her leg with my hand. She liked it and didn't resist at all. The cool thing was the friends couldn't see I was doing this. I know that girl often aren't comfortable with making out with you or escalating in front of their friends. I actually am gonna make a post on RSD because I want to know how you are supposed to play this. I feel like if I had been making out with her more, the pull could have happened.

As we were finishing dinner, I again whispered in her ear that we should hang out. Luckily, I got more isolation time when my girl decided to pay the bill with her card as she didn't have cash. The girl walked to the car while we had to wait up front to pay the cashier. I told her to tell her friends that we were gonna go watch the sunrise. I was giving her plausible deny-ability. Sex was more likely to happen cause she could feel like it was my fault and not feel like a slut. Plus, I was being alpha by telling her what to tell her friends and was demonstrating that I know how this all works. She said she would tell them to drop her off at her car.

Should have made out in the car:
We got to her car. I didn't escalate in the car ride. I held her hand and stroked her arms but didn't try to make out. I think that was the right move. When we got to her car, Mother Hen wanted to take a picture of my ID in case something happened to her friend. It was a little obnoxious but I also understand that she was just looking out for her friend. I tried to just give her my number but she kept insisting so I finally just did it. After all, my girl had just met me randomly in the club and while I was cool, I was a total stranger.

I got in the car and my girl was having trouble starting it. Eventually it did start. I think the move was I should have made her kiss me in the car. I could tell her buying temperature had dropped a little and she was tired. I told her to drive west on the Expressway.

My plan was to just have her drive all the way to my house and we'd pick the car up. I think this didn't happen cause she lost buying temperature. We had only driving like 8 minutes before she said, "How far is this?" I kept saying it wasn't far but she asked me for the specific exit. I passed the quicker exit and had her take the next exit. This was after I had tried saying, "Just keep going. My place is only 10 minutes further." She tried objecting that she had to get some rest. I said she could sleep in the extra bed and I said it wasn't far and we could just hang out.

I actually need to make a condensed post on RSD because I wonder if I should have lied and tried to keep her driving to my house.

We got off and got to my car. I told her to pull behind my car. I kissed her. We started to get into it. I was escalating and she was liking it. We weren't parked though. She was like 2 feet from the curb and had the engine and light on. I was having a hard time really escalating like I wanted to because of bucket seats. I knew if I could get some pressure on her pussy that it would really turn her on and possibly get her to come home with me. If we were making out on a couch, a bed, or even standing up, I could think of ways to do this. Sitting or lying down, I would put my arm in between her legs. I learn that from the Vin Dicarlo escalation ladder. You put the arm there and it looks like you do it for leverage and you put pressure on her pussy which turns her on but she won't object because it's not like you're touching it directly.

I started to bite and caress her neck. I started to feel her tits. She was wearing a shirt, so I just decided to move my hand there. I rubbed her pussy a little bit. She actually didn't resist. Thinking back, I should have just started doing it more. I like to use Manwhore's move of putting her hand on your cock but even though I was enjoying it, I wasn't getting a hard on because of the way I had to contort my body to do all this.

I stopped the escalation when she seemed to be into it to try to get her to drive to my place but she still wouldn't. I tried to get her to actually park the car, but at that point I had waited too long and her buying temperature had dropped again and eventually I had to get out of the car. We exchanged numbers and she said she'd be back. I thought it was gonna be like this girl I talk to in Missouri who might come back in several months. This girl said she's supposedly gonna be back in 2 weeks. I wouldn't have pushed so hard if I had known that, but maybe it's a good thing that I pushed this hard.

I still think I should have just started rubbing her pussy more. It's not like she moved my hand away right away. I was afraid she would as normally I wouldn't just put it there as quickly as I did. Maybe if I had left it there and really got her wet then we would have ended up fucking. The problem is I don't know any good spots to park near my buddy's place there. Whatever, I could have figured something out if I had gotten her that turned on.

Bombed a Day 2 that I thought was a likely lay

My night was a good example of persistence. Some of my wings need this lesson cause I can guarantee several of them would have just went home had they been in my situation. It's an example of the roller coaster ride that happens when you go out regularly.

Bombed a Day 2:
It's actually surprising that I didn't get laid tonight. The funny thing is that I'm still recovering from hives so I might not have enjoyed sex tonight as much I normally would, plus I wouldn't have been completely comfortable since the marks haven't completely healed yet. Still, I would have like to have gotten laid. Purple Shirt girl from several weeks ago text me. She has never initiated texts until tonight. If I text her, she'll respond, but tonight she text me in the evening and asked if I was going out. I told her I was probably going to Wrigley and she said she was gonna be out there too.

I knew that was a good sign but she was persistent too. I text two friends that this chick must have been ovulating. I hadn't left my buddy's house to get on the train cause I was waiting for Seagull to get off. I decided to leave when Purple shirt girl asked when I was getting out. As I was on the train, she again asked how long as she said she wanted to ditch her friend. She even tried calling me at one point. I thought this was a lock.

Maybe it was a mind trick, but it also is true that I had no momentum when we met up. Originally, I had planned to warm up before meeting her. Instead, I had gotten all drunk at my buddy's BBQ and didn't even talk that much there since I was so fucked up. I got on the train and since she was basically waiting for me, I had no time for warm up. I was gonna try to kiss her when I met up with her but she reacted coldly to the hug so I didn't go for it.

We sat down at this bar. I have to go there for Day 2's more often as they have $2 bud drafts every day. This chick was cool and ended up paying for her drinks. That's funny cause when I met her originally, she forced me to buy her a drink that day. I was a dumb ass and sat too far away from her at the bar. I had to lean in to touch her. Finally, a few minutes in, I just move my chair over. The conversation was okay. I kept trying to kino her but she didn't seem that comfortable with it. For example, I held her hand and she held my hand like a dead fish.

She mentioned she was going to meet up with her cousin for her birthday early on. I think she set that up for an escape in case I was lame. Maybe I was lame because I framed it that way in my head. Maybe I'm overanalyzing things though. As we were finishing the first beer, she said she could only have one more beer. As we were nearing the end of that second beer, I was starting to kino even more.

Again, I second guess myself because she didn't seem that into it and then seemed to be in a rush to leave. She said she was gonna take the train one stop south. I was debating taking the train as I was considering going to Division.

I'll give myself credit for being persistent. I asked, "You're not gonna invite me to come to this party?" I knew that she didn't want me to go, but I figured I might as well put it out there. She said some BS like she can't cause it's her cousin's birthday but she said we can hang out again and have 4-5 beers instead of just two. We hugged and then I decided I was gonna stay in Wrigley. I had an hour and half to work there and I love the Wrigley street game at closing time.

I actually considered just taking the train home. Seagull decided not to go out. The funny thing is he text me as I was on the blue line. I happened to be passing the stop we were gonna meet out. He would have gone out if I had gotten off but it was too late. Plus, I knew this Day 2 was gonna happen so I didn't want to be even later to it. Hershey and Raw were out in Wrigley but Hershey bailed before I even got there, which didn't surprise me. Nowadays, I'd be shocked if the dude was out for longer than an hour. While I do fine a solo game, it takes me effort to force myself to do it sometimes. When Seagull is going out, though, It's like I'm excited to go out, though.

I made the compromise with myself that I would go out the extra hour despite feeling shitty from not having a spectacular Day 2. I wouldn't say I was a total AFC lame ass, but I wasn't my true PUA self either. I guess I felt like I should have been at least kissing this Purple shirt girl again. It's too bad she hadn't gotten more drunk earlier. If she had been wasted like when I met her originally, maybe we would have hooked up.

Quick makeouts aren't that hard

Today was another example of how sarging cures all. My life has been screwed up this week and I was a little worried that I might have a shitty night. I hadn't been out since Saturday plus I've been dealing with all this crap the whole week. Seagull and I went out to our usual spot and two other wings showed up for a bit during the night.

We had to chug our free drinks since we got there about 15 minutes before the free drink cutoff. I'm sure the alcohol helped me get started. As usual, when I'm drunk, I open more aggressively on the dance floor. The reference experiences I'm getting from that will continue to help me open on the dance floor better while sober. Early on, I was dancing with this hot Latina girl but when I tried to escalate, she kept pushing me off. I danced with her and her friends for like 2 songs and then I went to work other sets.

Quick make out:
I had opened this blonde with a hat at some point in the night but it was a short set. I was standing in my usual high traffic spot near the end of the night when I saw her walking. I stopped her and we started dancing immediately. She was grinding on my from the start, so I started escalating. I brought her really close and then I made this dominant move of holding the back of her neck as I went for the kiss. She kissed me. I pulled back and then I kissed her again and we made out for a little bit. When I pulled back, she said she had to go outside.

This is where I screwed up. I need more experience with this late night quick make out stuff. I think my little bit of hesitation screwed things up. The first thing I said was, "Are you coming back?" She said that she was and then I kissed her again. Then she said she had to go outside again.

I wonder if I should have made out with her more. If we had been by the wall, I could have done the aggressive wall make out but we were standing far from a wall. I give myself credit for saying, "Let go out. Smoke time." I grabbed her hand and started to lead her and she resisted a bit and then I just let her walk off. Fuck.

I'm thinking I shouldn't have had that bit of hesitation. I needed to get her into the make out and then said, "Let's get out of here" and tried to pull her. Anything to throw it out there would have been good. I could have said, "I'm gonna go home and have some drinks and watch a movie. You should come." Anything like that.

Just a mind fuck:
I've written this before, but over the past three weeks, I see how only my mind was holding me back from getting more kiss closes and make outs in the past. Over the years, I've missed out on so many sets that could have gone farther. I see I can kiss girls really early in the set, especially if it's at the end of the night when most girls are drunk. I should mention that after this set, I started grinding with a hot Polish girl. I kept going for the kiss, but she wouldn't go for it, and eventually went away. I have to say that it feels so much better to go for it even when I'm rejected than to be scared like I usually was all these years.

Escalating too fast: Three Little Bears

I'm feeling a mixture of emotions as I write this and I have to admit that a large part of it is frustration. I should feel good. I went out and pushed my comfort zone and worked on what has been my sticking point for the past two months. Tonight, I didn't have to beat myself up like I did last night: I went for the kiss several times in the two mains sets of the night. I also didn't lose state when I got rejected and the set continued. I suppose part of the frustration is that tonight was a very humbling night. It's like I thought I was so close to figuring things out, but now I feel so far away. Usually, I'm able to break down every thing that I did and know where I went wrong. Right now, I keep drawing up blanks.

Calibration through experience:
I have to accept that this is the solution to my problem right now. I've spent so much time being stuck on early and middle game since I started this journey. Yeah, that sucks, but it is a result of me starting off at such a low level at this game. One lesson I should take from tonight is that I can't allow myself to waste any more time holding myself back like I did Friday and the many other times that I failed to go for the kiss. I need to just go for it and then I can spent more time in middle to late game.

If I keep going out and I push myself like I did tonight, I'm gonna make out with a lot of girls. I'm going to learn how to calibrate my escalation better. I'm gonna learn how to maintain the girl's buying temperature so she's willing to leave the club with me.

Feisty Chicago girl:
We still had to warm up tonight despite being out Friday. We had several bust outs until things started to click. I was standing by Seagull when this brunette walked by. I later learned she had gone to the same university I had, which always turns me on as it means the girl is intelligent. She also turned out to have a very strong personality, which I like too. She was obviously looking for someone. I stopped her and started talking. Initially, she resisted and said, "I'm looking for my friends." I just kept plowing and I remember saying, "Well, you found me (smile+arm around her)." I did a good job of creating man to woman kino right from the start.

As frustrated as I feel sometimes, I should take time to reflect on how good I am at certain aspects of the game now. Not too long ago, this set would have walked away from me, or we would have been standing a foot apart and nothing would have been happening. Instead, I opened a stranger, and right away I'm kino escalating and she's comfortable with it. Very quickly, we're facing each other, and our faces are really close together and it looks like we had to have known each other before.

I tried dancing with her but she didn't like to dance. That didn't stop her from moving with the music a little bit with me. I then isolated her to this love seat that was near us. I know that one thing you have to do if you wanna pull a girl is lead her around the club. This was the first step.

I'm not gonna kiss you:
When we sat down, we continued to hold hands. I had grabbed her hand to lead her to this love seat. We kept talking. I was close to her and we gazed into each other eyes and I moved to kiss her. She giggled and pushed me away. We kept talking and she kept messing with me. It was obviously loud, so our faces needed to be close, but several times she'd push me away and say she didn't want to kiss me. The thing was I wasn't trying to kiss her after the first time. I was chilling and just getting close to her since it was loud. I started to mess with her too when I got close to say something. I told her, "Look at you. You can't stop thinking about kissing me."

The thing I did right was I didn't lose state at any point when she pushed me away. I giggled a few times, but I mostly just kept talking. A few times I really pulled back and kept talking. She'd follow the no reason push offs (when I wasn't trying to kiss her) and say, "There's something about you I like." I remember her throwing out, "I like the way you touch me." Later she said she liked messing with me cause she could tell I could take it.

Do you want to go find my friends?:
I think this was the screw up. I agreed because I knew that I had to meet the friends to have a chance of pulling her. I think I went wrong here because I went from leader to follower. She didn't know where her friends were and we wandered through the dance floor. The only good thing I did was at one point, she was having trouble getting past someone, so I got in front and told her I was gonna lead her through the crowd. We got to the bar area and she couldn't find them. We danced for about a minute.

Here she said, "I have to go to the bathroom." I hate those words because I've heard it so many times when it was said to bust me out. Other times, I've screwed things up because the girl lost buying temperature, or the girl couldn't find me. This probably wasn't a blow off at this point as she said, "Where can I find you?" I said by the love seat area where we had been sitting. Before she left, I thought about leading her to the bathroom. I just threw out, "Do you know where the bathroom is?" She said she did. I then felt at the time that it was weird to lead her there then. Thinking about it now, I think I should have grabbed her hand and said, "I'll lead you to the bathroom. It's hard to get through this crowd."

After she said she knew where the bathroom was, she hugged me. As we seperated, I went to kiss her. She kissed me on the cheek. When she walked away, I started to open sets. I always think of the old TD/Owen piece where he says you shouldn't just stand there waiting for the girl. Well, I think if she left her purse with you or something you can. In this situation, I should open other sets so I'm talking to people when she comes out. I was a dumb ass in that I didn't go over where I said I'd meet her. I guess it's a form of ego protection. Maybe I didn't want to be over there in case she didn't come. WTF? That's dumb. I needed to go by the couch area and open sets there and look out for her.

Your set went downstairs:
I ran into Seagull after I opened a set and got busted out. I updated him on my situation. I walked by the couch area and didn't see her, but by the time I did this, she would have already have left the bathroom. As I was dancing on the dance floor, Seagull said he saw my girl walk down the stairs. I decided to go downstairs. We looked for her but couldn't find her. We walked back up and I thought I saw her standing by the street with a friend.

I had an inner debate about what to do. I figured she could be smoking as she was a smoker. Seagull suggested I go outside. I finally agreed cause I knew that if I didn't find her at all then I would regret not going outside. I had him go out first as I felt more comfortable as I could say we were going somewhere else and it wouldn't look like I was following her. She was with some guy and this tall, thin black girl. I opened my girl and said, "Oh hey! We were going to Barleycorn."

I got introduced to the friends. Then, I started talking to my girl. I said she should come to Barleycorn. She said she was going to some bar I never heard of. As I'm talking to my target, the friend starts cockblocking. She says, "Your boyfriend is texting me. Here, you should look at this." I knew the friend was full of shit. I guess I should have befriend them more. My target didn't say anything at first, but the friend kept persisting with that BS and my target began to play along. I finally just said, "Come over here." I pulled her a few feet away and tried to number close her. As I'm doing this, this big black guy comes and puts her arm around my target. The cockblock friend says, "There he is."

I could tell it wasn't her boyfriend. I knew my girl liked me. Yeah, she could have a boyfriend; I've sarged girls who's boyfriends happened to be in the place iwth them. This wasn't the case. In fact, when he put his arm on her, he left enough room that I was able to put my arm around her myself. He was taller than both of us and he just had his hand on her shoulder. She started to tell the friends that went went to the same school and that's why she was talking to me.

The cockblock friend then grabbed a taxi. She and the original guy started to get in. They started to pull my girl away and the big black guy was trying to pull her into the cab too. She gave me this look and said, "Sorry" and then got in the cab.

Anger, doubt, but it was under my control:
I have to admit that I felt a slight moment of doubt when the cockblock friend started her BS. I thought that maybe she had told them she met this creepy guy (me) and had been wanting to get away from me. I quickly blocked out that thought and I thought I proceeded pretty well after that. The way she looked at me when she was dragged to the cab made me realize that she did like me, but the friends just screwed things up. At that point, I was angry that the friend had been such a cockblock. That's always frustrating and it happens to the best PUA's so of course, it's gonna happen to me.

I have to accept some responsibility. I screwed up in this set. I let her lead when she was finding the friends. I also had that chance to lead her to the bathroom. I should have gone to the couch area right away. When I found her outside, I should have talked more to the friends. Often, you can just exchange names and that's enough. Clearly it wasn't in this case. I also could have pushed Seagull to talk to the friends so they were distracted. I guess from their perspective, I was just some random guy coming up to their friend. They didn't realize that I had hung out with her for a good amount of time inside and that we did have a connection.

Girl buys me a drink:
We actually did try to switch venues but the line was too long at the other place so we returned to the upstairs area where I met the first girl. I was following Seagull and he got into this set. It was a bad place to stand and I had busted out with one of his target's friend just a few minutes before he opened them so I walked off. I sat down for a second as I answered a text. No one was sitting around me. Suddenly, this brunette with pale skin sat down next to me. In the past, I would have thought it was coincidence, but my mind immediately said, "Proximity IOI." I turned to her and said, "Hey, what's up?" and introduced myself.

Right away, I could tell she was high buying temperature. I think the giveaway was the way she moved her face close to me to talk. I quickly put my arm around her and started holding her hands. I remember that I went to kiss her pretty early on. I actually paused while writing this as I wanted to remember the exact sequence of kino I used right before I went to the kiss and what I said. I can't remember. I guess that's a good sign. I'm started to just escalate and go for the kiss without really thinking about it too much. I know I had a lot of kino before that. I had held her hand. I had my arm around her several times. I had stroked her hair and caressed her neck. I remember that we must have been looking into each other eyes and I just moved forward to go for the kiss.

Heck, I must have gone for the kiss even earlier than I remembered when I was writing the last paragraph. I remember that I had escalated quickly and we hadn't really talked much. I think I went for the kiss within like 2-3 minutes cause she objected and said, "I don't even know you." I responded with the usual Tim line, "My name is Pokerpua. My favorite color is blue. What do you want to know?"

We started talking. I found out she was in the army and was on leave. We talked about travel. She mentioned buying me a drink. I agreed and then we kept talking. At one point, she started to tell me that she likes girls. I said I like bisexual women and she tried to tell me she wasn't into guys. Obviously, it was BS but I just rolled with it. As she was telling me this, I was holding her hand as I had my arm around her.

The drink came up again and I agreed. She said she'd be back. I learned from the last set so I went up with her. As she was leaning in to order a drink, she had to squeeze in next to a guy that was a the bar. He tried to open her but I was right up on her from behind and he saw that and just backed off.

Overescalating?
She was generous with the drinks. She bought me a beer. She said we were doing a shot too. It cost her like $17.50 + tip. We did the shot. I was all over her the whole time I was at the bar. I don't know if that was a mistake. Again, I have a lot to experience with mid game. I can't tell if I was calibrating correctly while I was doing it. I remember we did the shot and then we were standing there with the beer. I asked, "Do you wanna dance?" and then she said, "I'm gonna find my friends but I'll look for you."

I can't figure out where I went wrong in this set. Maybe I could have backed off the kino a little bit. I think I did things correctly by going with her to the bar as it immediately busted out that guy who tried to open her. When we got the drink, I could have kept holding her hand but backed off a little. I think I needed to lead more after we drank the shot. I remember my mind saying that I should isolated her to the couch area. We could have sat back down where we had met also as that was just a few feet away from where we got the drink.

If you don't lead, she will:
I think of this phrase I heard somewhere on RSD and it seems to apply to the army girl. We had a moment after the drink where we were just standing there and I asked her to dance in a way that wasn't too confident. That my mind thought about the move to the love seat from the other set means that probably was the right move. I was worried the seat would be taken, but there were other places to sit. As soon as we had that moment where it wasn't clear what we were doing, I just needed to be dominant and lead her to do something. The dance floor, the love seat, or sitting back where we started were all viable options.

It goes back to the fact that to seed the pull you need to get the girl comfortable with you leading her all over the club. I should have lead to the love seat. We could have stopped in one of my spots with cool air as she had complained about being too hot. After we chilled on the love seat, I could have lead her to the dance floor and probably been able to kiss her there if I couldn't do it on the love seat. I could have also considered bringing her downstairs, though it's too bright down there and is a bit of a state break.

State crash:
I had a state crash after I lost that set. I went to look for her and couldn't find her. I also had forgotten what she was wearing. Fuck! I opened a set of black girls with Seagull. It's funny that I had to push him to talk to the friends as he was just standing there for a moment not doing anything. As I was working my target, some white guy just came in between us and started kissing her. There goes that set. I left but Seagull got along well with the girl he was talking to and he ended up going to her hotel. I was left wandering around trying to make something happen. I was frustrated that I had two good sets and until I started writing this, I was at a loss with why I lost the sets.

I wanted to just go home but I pushed myself to go to Division. I ran some game there but I know it was a half effort. My state was bad and it was because I forgot the golden rule. I can't be outcome oriented. I need to practice on working the skill set and not worrying about getting the girls. Instead, I kept beating myself up cause I lost the two girls tonight when instead I should have been happy that I went for the kiss close and had two good sets.

I had fun at Division singing along with some songs and getting on the dance floor. My game was shitty there. I opened some girls but I kept finding excuses not to keep the set going or excuse not to open other sets. I kept saying, "Oh, that girl is with that guy." The 4 different girls I said that about in my head ended up not even being with any of those guys. If I hadn't indulged that state crash and ran real game at Division, maybe one of those girls would have worked out. I'll close by saying the state crash was a weird feeling. It's so rare for me to feel that way nowadays. Usually, I try every set that I want and at the end I was afraid of several sets. At least experience this negative will reinforce my drive to be an opening machine like I usually am.

Screwed up a pull cause of a short layoff

I was feeling shitty all week. I think it's I started to focus on the things that are screwed up in my life instead of trying to ride the wave of success in sarging that was starting to build at the end of last week. Another aspect is that my mind was again having trouble accepting that I was finally seeing some real success in this.

I realized today that this is the wrong time to slow down. I'm just starting to get the kiss close down and I need to just get comfortable with this so I no longer have to think about it. I have to just keep going out and focus on pushing myself to work on the kiss close. I need to get unconscious competence with the kiss close, to use a term TD uses. I liken it to my kino escalation. I barely have to focus conscious thought in kino escalation. I go in and turn the conversation man-to-woman, to use Jeffy's term, automatically, especially if I've already built some momentum from warm ups. Not too long ago, lack of kino escalation was a huge thing that killed my sets. Now, it's the kiss close. I think after tonight's frustration, I'll do better Saturday night, and I just have to go out a few times during the week next week so I can really get comfortable kiss girls quickly.

Should have been a quick street sarge kiss close:
Before I get into the pull, let me start at the end. There was this mixed 4 set standing on Division. I ended up talking to this girl that said she had just come back from Africa. We hit it off, of course, cause she's really into travel, plus she was high buying temperature. Naturally, I started kino escalating and had strong, dominant eye contact. The strong eye contact is like my best move now. It seems like once they start really looking into my eyes, it's over; I'm so relaxed and comfortable gazing into their eyes that the sexual tension builds.

It was so obvious that I needed to go for the kiss close that Seagull interrupted me and showed me his phone which said, "Kiss." I suspected I was close and it was good that he tried to steer me towards doing it. I hesitated though. I hesitated twice and it's frustrating as that was the same situations I found myself in last Friday. Saturday was the big breakthrough when I kissed the street set pretty quickly.

Even if the girl rejected me, I should have gone for it. Instead, I tried to number close and she didn't want to give me her number cause we had just met. It's funny, though, that there was a good chance she would have kissed me after just knowing me for a few minutes.

Screwed up a pull:
I opened this Puerto Rican girl with big tits. She was a little overweight but she was attractive and she smelled really good. I wasn't even planning on sarging her. I was just talking by and saw she looked a little too serious. Anytime I see women like that, I just want to come in high energy and cheer them up. I opened her and I was gonna leave when I noticed she was kinoing me and the eye contact was good.

I kino escalated a bit and she wanted to dance but I put her off a for a bit. Then, a few minutes later, I took her to the dance floor. She was comfortable with grinding immediately and of course that started to feel good. I started escalating a little bit and like a song or two in, we were facing each other and really close together and she started kissing my neck. I reciprocated. I knew I should have went for the kiss but I kept stalling. Again, I blame the layoff but it's still stupid.

What else do I want a girl to do:
I feel so dumb when I sit here thinking about the night. She's grinding on me and kissing my neck. I'm kissing and sucking on her neck. I just needed to hold eye contact and then maybe hold her face or neck and kissed her. It was unlikely I was gonna get rejected. Anyways, I already know that it's better to go for it too early (even though this clearly wasn't too early) and get rejected than to stall.

I didn't want to get too sweaty so I isolated her off the dance floor. We sat down and built some rapport. I was holding her hand and rubbing her leg. Again, I should have kissed her here. I talked about logistics. I mentioned having beers at my place. She wanted to grab food, but I was trying to avoid that. Instead, I should agree to food and then deal with that when I get her to the car.

Should have pulled then:
Well, the key move was to start kissing her. I needed to make out a little, break it off, and then try to lead her out of the bar. Still, I could have made this work. She wanted to get a beer and then we were gonna leave. She grabbed a beer and I think I screwed things up because I let her lose buying temperature. I had my arm around her and stuff but I needed to keep talking while she was waiting for and drinking the beer and/or I needed to keep escalating. She got the beer and I started to lead her towards the front area.

She let go of my hand and was talking to the girls at this booth that sells t-shirts. I always wonder when I'm supposed to stay on the girl or give her some space. I didn't want to seem needy, but tonight that was the wrong move. I gotta stay on the girl. I wandered off a bit near the front and sang along with the karaoke.

That move might have been fine but I wasn't watching close enough and she walked by quickly to go outside and have a cigarette. I knew they weren't gonna let her outside with the drink. I found Seagull and started to talk about logistics as he had stuff in my car. I finally decided to go outside. It turned out it was late enough that you couldn't leave and come back. I saw her at the top of the stairs, near the entrance. Some Latino guy sensed she was high buying temperature and he was trying to pull her.

Busting the guy out:
Every time I have to pull girls off guys I have a brief second where I think about how I don't really want to do it. Still, after a second or two, I end up putting on my game face and doing it. I put a lot of work into a set and I like RSD Tim's analogy: I'm not gonna abandon the house if a wall falls down. I went in and just ignored the guy and started talking into her ear. I was having a hard time pulling her attention which is rare for me. Seagull started trying to get the guys attention; again, another good wing man move. The bouncer started telling all of us that we either had to leave or go back downstairs. I grabbed the girls hand and kept saying, "Let's go downstairs" and the dude gave up after about 20 seconds.

She walked with me and then ran off the back. It was closed but she said she had stuff back there so they let her in. I figured I'd try again when I saw her. In the meantime, I helped Seagull work some sets. Tonight he was actually high energy at the end and worked several sets with the intention of trying to pull. Sometimes, it's just me doing that stuff so it was refreshing to have him in top form. We had a few decent sets but ultimately we couldn't get anything.

Just as I was about to leave, I saw the girl talking to some new guy. I went in and tried to pull her and she started waving me off. FUCK! Obviously, now I know where I went wrong. I had that pull about 90% of the way. I just need to fix my kiss close problem again that I had solved for two days last week.

I need to talk to him:
There was this set I had opened earlier in that same bar. I was gonna go back in but Seagull didn't want to plow and I ended up sarging that Puerto Rican girl. It was this redhead and her friends from Milwaukee. Perhaps, if I had worked her more earlier, I would have had a chance. Instead, I saw her outside. Seagull was working this tall black girl that was one of the friends. It was funny. He said she was ugly when we were in the set. I said she had a fine body, which she did, and he realized she was cute when he saw her outside. I opened the redhead. Some black dude was sarging her.

I got her attention off the guy briefly. Then, she needed a lighter and the guy used that to pull her off me. I couldn't follow, I felt, as she said, "I'm gonna get a light and be back." I knew she wasn't coming back but I figured I'd just open her again in a few minutes.

I went up to her and started talking in her ear. She said, "I wanna talk to this guy for sec." I kept plowing and threw a few verbal AMOG jabs at the dude. Seagull then started talking to the guy. I just decided to give up. I told Seagull, "I know I could probably bust out the guy, but the girl didn't really like me at this point so what was the point?"

I suppose the other argument is the old TD realization that buying temperature is transferable. If I kept plowing and busted out the dude, she would have started to like me as she had liked him. I guess I should have plowed. After all, she liked me when I first went into the set, and many girls get attracted to me if they let me talk to them and escalate for a few mins.

Learn from the pain:
I'm happy that I had two sets where I should have kissed the girls. It still amazes me when I think about how I can go out on any given night and have a good chance of having the opportunity to make out with 1-2 girls. It's a new reality that I'm still struggling to accept. I'm frustrated that if I just did a few things differently, I probably would have been having sex with that Puerto Rican girl right now. Damn!

I feel better after sarging. Sarging does cure all. I know I'll have momentum tonight and I think the pain will make me pull the trigger when the kiss close opportunities inevitably happen again tonight.